Time to forgive
by Nat15
Summary: How things would turn after Tara finds out about Christian and Kat's new affair? Will she ever get over it?
1. Chapter 1

1-Tara

Being alone at the Academy is something I though I could get used to. After the whole thing with Christian and Kat, it was like I had no one to talk. There was Sammy… but I couldn't make him choose between me and them, and I was for sure not making a deal about this either.

Who was left then? Grace? Bitch! She fooled me so badly I can't even look at her face without wanting to kill her. There was also Abgail, but the things I had to say I wasn't going tell her for sure. She got better with time, but is still someone I don't trust. What takes me to Ben… Again…

I'm trying to figure him out, but the guy is just so crazy he confuses me. At a point he is there for me as a great friend would be and in the next second he just turns into a five-year-old prank kid. But he was there when Saskia hurt my back, he was there for me, helping me through the whole Christian thing.

The funny part is that I have this same conversation with myself everyday going to the Academy, is like doing my own list of pros and cons in my head, but it seems like I will never be able to make up my mind. Not dancing is worst, gives me more time to thing about all this, and still, I have to go to classes while I watch my ex-boyfriend dance with my ex-friend. Great, right?

I got to the Academy feeling like a zombie, I never felt like I was perfect fitted there, now I almost felt like I never had and never would fit anywhere.

I sat there in the stairs and felt a hand in my shoulder. A guy sat next to me, and without looking I could tell it was Ben.

"Hey." – He said cheerfully.

"Hi Ben." – I said looking down.

"Woke up to the wrong side of the bed this morning or what? Why are you so sad?"

"Come on, you already know."

"What if I want you to tell me again? You know I have terrible memory…"

"Or maybe you're just not paying attention to any of the things I say."

"Ouch, you almost made me feel like a bad friend. You know I wouldn't do that. If I didn't want to hear you I would tell you, trust me."

"Really Ben, is not a big deal, I'm just tired of coming here everyday, watch other people dance while I'm losing time with this recovery thing. It has been like almost two months already. I mean, I've been through that before, but that time I had Christ… It was different."

"You had Christian. I get it, is not just about the dancing."

"Yes it is. I just meant that…"

"Tara come on, I know you. Trust me you will get over this, with or without Christian, you are stronger than you think. Plus, you still can count on me, whenever you need."

"Thanks Ben. You have been great to me."

"I know. I just can't help it. I'm always great!"

We both started laughing but as soon as I saw Christian coming down the hallway, everything went gray again. It was like all the pain came back in a second, coming from nowhere. And although I tried to deny it, I missed him, but I was too much hurt to tell him that.

"Ben… I'm going to the studio; the class starts in a few minutes so I think I'd better go."

I just kept looking at Christian a little hypnotized until Ben answered me, and I'm pretty sure he noticed what was going on. Christian was standing still in the end of the hallway staring me back.

"Ok Tara, I'm sure you are really worried about getting late, go, I'll catch up later."

I nodded yes and went to the studio with my head down.


	2. Chapter 2

2-Christian

This is starting to get serious. I'm sick of seeing Tara and Ben together. Great friends… Am I supposed to believe that? Does she think I'm stupid? I get she is sad about what happened with Kat, but it didn't worked out and she don't even talk to me, let me explain things to see if we can move on. The way she discovered that didn't help too.

No one meant to tell her, she just discovered it through a walkie talkie. We tried to explain but Tara was just so sad she couldn't say a word. Ben started that walkie talkie thing, and I kind of blame him for giving it to her, and letting she hear the whole conversation I was having with Kat.

See they together killed me inside every time, he had his arm around her shoulders and he was looking at her like… I don't know! That guy was just getting to close; he'd better put himself on his place. It has been like that since Tara's accident, she doesn't talk to me or Kat, and she barely sees Sammy. Everything is about Ben, now that she is back at the academy.

I walked towards him, not really in the mood for a chat. But of course he didn't get that just by my angry face, he wasn't that smart.

- Hey bro.

- Don't call me bro, okay?

- Okay. I guess Tara is not the only one in a bad mood this morning.

- Can you let Tara out of this?

- I'm just saying dude…

- You know what? You talk too much some times.

- What's wrong with you Christian?

- Nothing!

- Is it Tara?

- I told you to let her out of this!

I pushed him, but before he could react, Miss. Raine came by.

- Hey, hey, stop it. This is the National Academy of Dance, and if you are not here to dance, you should leave.

We both nodded and she went down the hallway. Ben tried to enter the studio, but I held his arm.

- Do you want to know what my problem is? My problem is you.

He looked at me like he didn't know what I was talking about, but he had that ironical smile on his face. Oh, his face. God it looked like such a great face to punch.

I got to the studio and saw Tara sitting in corner alone. I walked over to reach her spot. When I finally got close to sit next to her she looked away. I stand there trying to find the right words, but I didn't know how to start. I looked around just to check where Ben was, I didn't want him to interrupt this. I found him talking with Kat that was staring at me. The things with Tara are tough, but they are not better with Kat. We talked about what happened, but our friendship is not the same, and this is for sure about Tara. I was trying to avoid this, but the truth is that I need her; I'm in love with her. Kat needs her too. And the only way for me and Kat to be friends again is Tara forgiving us. Otherwise, this guilt will keep getting heavier until none of us can stand it.

I looked at Tara again, but she kept looking down.

- So… Hi. – I told her, a little insecure.

No answer. That was a bad sign.

- How is the recovery going?

- Fine - She was still not looking at me.

- Does your back still hurt?

- No.

Great, so one-word-answer is all I'm gonna get?

- Tara… I think we should talk.

- I don't think so.

- Come on. It is about time to solve this.

- You know Christian, for me everything looks crystal clear.

- You don't get it…

- Oh I get it. YOU don't get it.

- No Tara, you don't understand. Me and Kat we just…

- I'm really not looking forward to the details Christian. I know what I need to, and that is enough.

- This is not fair…

- Really? Not fair for me to be angry that my supposed boyfriend hooked up with my supposed best friend. And it is not fair with you?

I was going to answer when Saskia came by, then I realized that everybody in the class was staring at us.

- Am I interrupting something? – Saskia asked looking pretty mad.

- Actually yes! – I told her without thinking twice.

- Really? Maybe you two should solve your personal problems in your free time, some people here are looking forward to some kind of improvement, it is not fair with them to let people like you interrupt them. Specially you Tara, just because you can't dance it doesn't mean you have to get in someone else's way.

- We all know the reason why she can't dance! – I told Saskia, that woman have some serious problems.

- As I said, that is your problem, not mine. Now both of you, out of my class, I'm sick of this. Come one, move! Right now!

Me and Tara walked out the classroom, and I could tell by her face she wasn't that happy with my attempt of defending her.


	3. Chapter 3

3-Tara

Okay, so Christian was trying really hard to ruin my life, which was the only explanation possible. He was trying to "defend" me with Saskia, but he ended up getting both of us out of the class. I was looking at him now, not sad, broken, or hurt, just really and truly mad.

- What were you thinking?

- Helping you I guess…

- Great, look where we are now.

- What did you want me to do? Let her talk about you like that? About us? In front of everyone?

- There is no us, for Saskia to talk about Christian.

- What do you want from me Tara?

- Right now? Nothing! I don't expect anything from you Christian. That is why I didn't want to talk to you; I knew something like this would happen. You know what? This is a sign; we really should try to stay away from each other.

- No! We are not gonna solve anything doing that. Tara you have to stop running away from your fears.

- Sorry… What? My fears? You broke up with me, to be with my best friend, and I wouldn't know if it wasn't for that stupid walkie talkie.

- So is this all my fault now?

- No, this is my fault, for being so stupid. I should have known this wouldn't work out. But now I'm out of your way, you and Kat, whatever. I don't care anymore.

I wanted to tell him that I did care and how I've missed him and Kat, but I couldn't stop thinking of what he did. One day he loves me and the next day he wants to be with my best friend?

- I know you care Tara. We said we loved each other. You loved me.

- You said you loved me too. Look how the things are now; this is not what love is about Christian.

- What it is then?

- I don't know, and right now I really don't care. I don't even want to have this conversation with you.

- But you spend hours talking to Ben without complaining, right?

- Hey, this is not about Ben, don't put him into this.

- He already is into this Tara, the guy is falling for you and he doesn't deserve you, he doesn't get you like…

- Like who Christian? You? Give me a break, you have no right to tell me who I'm supposed to talk to, Ben is a nice guy and he was there for me when you and Kat weren't.

- Tara he doesn't want to be your friend that is so obvious, God how can you be so ingenuous?

- Christian whatever goes on between me and Ben is none of your business. Why do you even care?

- Because I care about you! I care about us!

- A little too late for that…

- It was a mistake ok? Me and Kat! It didn't work out and now I'm trying to solve this with you, because I love you, I still do. I didn't lie to you about it! Why can't you just get over that?

- I'm trying Christian, but the things don't work like that, and right now you are definitely not making this easier for me!

I could feel tears fulfilling my eyes; I turned and walked away from him. I wanted this to be just as easy as he was saying; fight against this killed me inside too. But I couldn't just forget everything that had happened. In part having this argument with him let me put some of those feelings out, but I could still feel like I was about to explode. And there is still Kat. I haven't talk to her. We barely look at each other, but talking to her and Christian are two things that are definitely not in the top of my to-do list.


	4. Chapter 4

4-Christian

After she walked away from me I wish I could disappear. To hear Tara saying those things made me feel worst and I didn't even know that was possible. I remember when she got expelled from the academy. I wasn't there to help her, but Ben was, when she was at home and her life was falling to the pieces I couldn't find strength to call her, and when I finally did, she ignored me. It hurts to see how terrible things are, and worst is to know that this is my fault. I'm kind of feeling I really don't deserve her, but I refuse to believe she doesn't feel anything about me anymore.

I searched for Kat like crazy, if things had to be solved we would have to work together, and make up our minds before we could talk to Tara. I saw her sitting alone in one of the café's tables. I took the sit next to her, but she kept looking down for a while.

- Hi. – I whispered.

She didn't answer me.

- I know we haven't been talking these days. Especially since Sammy told us how he was feeling about this, and how we were using him to hang out. I think it is about time for us to talk this out.

- I agree.

- We went way too far this time Kat.

- And for what? It didn't work out.

- I know I told you I felt something about you, but you were right the whole time, I was fooling myself to pretend I wasn't in love with… Tara.

- I know.

- And… I miss being friends with you.

- Me too. – She finally looked at me, she took a deep breath – We screwed everything.

- Yes, we did.

- When I called Tara, I could feel the pain in her voice.

- Well, at least she got your call.

We kept silent for a while, and then Kat took my hand making me turn to look at her.

- So… What are we? Friends?

- I guess, if that is ok with you.

She smiled.

- I came to realize that the attraction I felt for you, is not worth losing your and Tara's friendship. I have been feeling stupid and lonely all this time, but I was too afraid of talking to you or her.

- I know how it feels like. So… Friends? – I extended my hand for her to shake.

She shook it and then hugged me friendly.

- I've missed this, friend. – She looked at me smiling.

- Me too.

- So… What do we do now?

- I guess we should find a way to talk to Tara, the three of us together.

- I think she is not looking forward to it. Maybe we should ask Ben's help.

- No, we are not putting him into this.

- Why? They have been close lately.

- He has nothing to do with this.

- Wait… Christian… Are you jealous?

I didn't answer her; I just looked down at my feet.

- Yes you are! You still love Tara!

- Fine, I am jealous ok. Are you happy now? I can't stand to look at that guy, Tara is a thousand miles away, and he just seems to push her further.

- Look, they are just friends. Ben has totally been friendzoned, trust me.

I looked away trying to put that in my mind, they are just friends and suddenly I saw Tara… With Ben.

- Really? You sure? – I pointed the end of the pier, where they were standing together.

Kat followed with her eyes until she found them. She looked kind of surprised but she put herself together to look at me.

- Look this doesn't mean anything, I am standing here talking to you just like they are and we are not dating.

Maybe she was right, maybe they were just friends, but I wasn't going to take the risk, I had to solve things with her, and keep Ben where he was, in the friendzone.


	5. Chapter 5

5-Tara

- You should totally forget that Webster. Think about something fun, just let it go. – Ben said trying to cheer me up.

- Ben you don't get it. I don't even want to look at him. Every time we see each other, things get worst! Like I didn't have enough problems with Saskia already!

- He could be just trying to help you. Have you ever thought about that possibility?

- When I accepted to take a walk with you it was because I thought you would support me, and make me think about anything but him.

- I am supporting you Tara. But I think you should talk to him.

- Why would I do that?

- Because every single time we talk he is in the conversation. You don't admit it, but you just can't stop thinking about Christian. And it's not that cool to talk to you knowing you are thinking about someone else.

- Is just that, right now you are the only person who I can talk to about this.

- And I feel honored, trust me, I do. But it is because you are special to me that I am worried about you. I have a feeling the only way for you to get over this is talking to Kat and Christian. You care about them too much, to just forget about what happened. I'm not saying you should back together with him, far from that, but you should hear what he has to say.

- You know sometimes you just seem so deep, sensitive and smart… You just don't look like you!

- Hey, I'm here trying to help you and that is what you have to say to me?

I couldn't help but laugh at his face.

- Benjamin Tickle, you are one of a kind.

We kept walking down the pier; it was getting late so in a few minutes we decided to go back to the student's residence.

One of the cons of being back at the academy is probably being in the same room as Grace. Thankfully since I discovered the things she did we have been ignoring each other. I try to spend as much time as I can outside of the residence, being there makes me interact with Kat, Christian and Grace. The three of them in the same room is just too much for me right now.

When I got to my room Grace wasn't there. Thank God! If Miss. Raine knew half of the things Grace did… But there were no proofs, so how could I make she believe that her goddaughter was such a horrible person? That girl had some serious problems going on.

I took a bath, changed and used the computer for a while, nothing really interesting going on, so I decided to go downstairs have some dinner. Ben was sitting in the couch alone watching TV.

- Came to save me from loneliness? – he said.

- I guess. Why are you here alone?

- I don't know. I think everybody is out, it is Friday night.

- But how about tomorrow? There are classes tomorrow.

- I don't think they are worried about that Tara. – He chuckled and hit with the palm of his hand the sit next to him in the couch – Do you wanna join me or not?

- Sure, I'll just gonna find something to eat. I'm starving.

I went to the kitchen but I could hear him yelling trying to keep the conversation.

- So what were you up to this afternoon after we came back?

- Not much. How about you?

- I went to the gym, and spent about one hour there. Not much too.

-You have been working out a lot. Trying to prove something?

- No, I like working out, especially when I have something in my mind. It helps me, for some reason.

- I guess I spend so much time complaining about my problems, that you don't even have time to tell me yours. What is going on in your head?

- Are you sure you want to know? I might scare you.

He started laughing; I came back with some pasta and took the sit next to him.

- Of course I'm sure. I want to help you.

- I don't know if I should talk to you about this, at least now.

- Now you are scaring me. Is something that serious?

- For me it is serious. But before I do anything I want to think this out carefully. I might look like I do, but I don't really like taking risks when it comes to… This.

- This what?

- Can we just change the subject? Your pasta looks delicious by the way.

I looked at his face; he opened his mouth like waiting for me to put some pasta there. I did it, but most of the food on the fork fell on the couch because I was laughing too hard at that scene. I couldn't really concentrate.

- I really feel like I'm your mom just now.

We were both laughing when I heard someone knocking in the living room's door that by the way was already open, so it was just meant to call our attention. I turned and realized Christian was staring at us.

- Am I interrupting something?

- No dude. Is just that this food it is so delicious, you should have some. Isn't it delicious Tara?

- Sure Ben. – I said looking down at my plate.

I kept looking down but I could hear Christian's steps leaving the room. Then I heard a door closing and turned to look at Ben again. He was staring at me with a cute smile. I think he got I didn't want to talk about that.

- So, do you want to see the penguins on Discovery or should we look for something else?

I smiled at him comment.

- Whatever you want.

- Penguins then.


	6. Chapter 6

6-Christian

I closed the door behind me with lots of hate. I hated myself, Ben, Tara, I even hated that stupid plate of pasta. I had spent the rest of my afternoon trying to keep in mind what Kat told me. "Ben is friendzoned, they are just friends!", then I got here and they are acting all couple like.

Standing in that room alone and silent I could hear Ben laughing really loud. In part I wanted to know what they were talking about, but I knew if I left that room things could get ugly. So it was Friday night and I would spend it in my room, how great is that?

After a few minutes I heard the door open, it was Sammy. We weren't so close lately, because he, just like every single person on school knew what happened, thanks to Grace. None of them supported me but I knew they were right… What we did, me and Kat, that was beyond the limits.

I watched as he put one of the shirts there were on his bed in the closet. He seemed to be ignoring me, and I hated that too.

- Hi Sammy.

He did some sort of noise, that was probably a try to greet me.

- So what have you been up to lately?

- Some stuff, nothing really important.

- Ok… How about hip hop, have you been practicing?

- What do you want Christian?

- What you mean?

- I mean, I can't believe there is no reason behind this "casual chat". Every time you do this, it has something to do with Tara. What do you want from me this time?

- Nothing dude, God, I was just trying to talk to you. What's wrong with that?

- Nothing is wrong Christian.

- Why would I expect something from you Sammy? I know you won't help me with Tara.

- You see. This is always about her. Don't you think you have done enough already?

- I can't believe you are saying that. You know I didn't mean to hurt her.

- Really? You hooked up with her best friend and you though that wouldn't hurt her?

- Why are yelling at me about this?

- Because it is your fault. You and Kat did this. Things were great; everything was going just fine before you guys screwed everything up. Now I don't talk to you, or Kat, or Tara, because the three of you have this little war going on.

- Don't you think I know that? Don't you think I know this is my fault? I'm trying to solve things, but nobody is helping, you as an example don't even talk to me.

- Because I don't want to get in the middle of this anymore! I talked to Ben, he agrees, we should just stay out of this, and let you clear things up by yourself.

- Ben, of course he says that, the guy is falling for Tara! Why would he want me to talk to her? Why would he want her to forgive me?

- Yeah sure, think like that, I don't care.

- What you mean Sammy?

- You know what I mean Christian. Isn't it easier to think everybody is against you, and other people are pushing Tara away from you, instead of accepting that you are too much of coward to talk to her face to face and deal with this by yourself?

I couldn't answer him, it hurt to hear him saying that, but the worst part was that he was right. He stared at me disappointed and it was when I finally came to realize how what I did had affected other people. It wasn't just me, Kat and Tara, the people around us, they were affected too.

Sammy left the room without saying anything else. I don't know how late he got back, after that conversation I wasn't in the mood to deal with the rest of the world anymore. I just fell on my bed and tried not to think much of the stupid coward I had become.


	7. Chapter 7

7-Tara

The rest of my night was incredibly fun. I stand there watching penguins with Ben until Sammy joined us and we decided to play some billiard.

I went to my room before Grace even got back to the residence and instantly fell asleep. I don't get Grace, I don't know what kind of crazy things she would be doing that night but I remember waking up after midnight and she wasn't there yet.

From that day on, me, Ben and Sammy started to hang out every time we could. We had lunch together, dinner together, every break we had from the class, there we were… Together.

One week went by and things were starting to get better. I didn't talk to Christian or Kat, so no more arguments. Besides, my back was getting better and in a few time I would start dancing again. When I went to the Academy's doctor, she told me that in one week I could start on the bars again, this happened in a Monday, so I was now only two days away of my return.

On this Saturday morning specifically we wouldn't have any classes. We were having breakfast when Ben came up with a great idea.

- Beach!

- Ben stop talking with your mouth filled. I'm seeing your fried eggs from o whole new perspective! – Sammy said pointing to Ben's mouth.

- No dude, it just hit me. We are not having classes today, are we going to waste this? This is kind of a miracle.

- Is not a miracle Ben, it is called Prix de Fonteyn. The teachers where out today because of that, some kind of meeting. – I said still laughing of Sammy's comment.

- It doesn't matter T! Ben is right. Look how beautiful it is today, we should totally go to the beach.

We all agreed and went to the beach. We had lunch there, which was pretty fun considering that most of our food Ben let fall down in the sand, but none of us cared about it, we were just having such a great time.

We were sitting in the sand looking at the sea when Sammy's phone ringed. He ran to answer but he didn't seem happy when he checked who was calling.

- What? – He seemed angry.

- I can't right now. – He answered – I'm with Ben and Tara, yes. Why?

He took a deep breath seeming really upset.

- You know what? Do whatever you want; you don't care about what other people think.

He looked around like he was trying to focus on anything but the person on the other side of the line.

-You know where I am, and you know what I think. Do what you want, but if you make things worst… - Sammy hung up.

He didn't finished but everything was clear, if that person makes things worst there would be some serious problems.

He came back to sit beside me.

- Who was it?

- Nobody.

- So you were talking to a ghost…

- No T, is just, nobody important. Not someone I want to talk about right now.

- Ok then. Should I be worried about you Sammy? – I asked him, but he was looking away.

- Not about me. – He finally turned to look at me and Ben.


	8. Chapter 8

8-Christian

After I hang up, I didn't know what to do. I called Sammy to check if he was up to something, I really wanted to win his friendship back. When I asked where he was and he told me he was in the beach with Tara and Ben a lot of things came through my mind. I thought about being there with Tara, then I thought about she been there with Ben. I thought it would be a good idea to go there, maybe we could talk, but just by Sammy's tone on the phone I could tell he wouldn't like that.

It was probably not a good idea, besides me and Kat had agreed to talk to Tara together, but that was one week ago and until now, nothing. We were talking more than before our conversation at the café; things were getting normal again, slowly. But we didn't talk about Tara again and how we would approach her.

I tried to think that Sammy was also there, but picturing Ben and Tara at the beach, I mean, I used to go there with her, I should be there with her. Any other option just seemed so wrong.

I decided to go there, even if they tried to kick me out, at least I would have tried. Sammy's words kept coming back in my mind: "if you make things worst…" what if I really make things worst? But there again he told me I should be brave and face Tara.

I walked over to the beach. I could see them in the distance, Ben and Tara in the water; Sammy was sitting in the sand. When he saw me he came by.

- You came. – He said with no excitement.

- Yes, I did.

- If this is about you and Tara I think this is not the best moment Christian. We are having such a great day; I haven't seen Tara this happy for a long time.

- And you think if I talk to her I'll screw that.

- I know you will! There is just no way of making this conversation good or fun. I mean look at her, she is so happy just now, you guys can talk this out some other time.

I was looking at her; she was playing with Ben in the water. I could tell she was really happy; she had a big smile in her face. When Ben took her in his arms and lifted her I felt something in me, like someone had just punched me in the face.

- So what are you going to do?

Sammy asked me looking pretty serious. I just turned around and walked away. The conversation I had to have with Tara isn't supposed to be now, not here, and for sure not with Ben around, it should be me and her, and Kat maybe. I'm not sure. I wish I could have an intimate conversation with Tara, and I can't do that if Kat is around.

I came back to the residence and Kat was sitting in the couch, when she saw me, she closed the magazine she was reading at got up from her sit.

- Hi! – She said smiling.

- Hey Kat.

- What is wrong? What happened that made you so sad?

- Nothing, is just that, it has to do with…

- Tara.

- Yes, remember when I said we should talk to her, the three of us?

- Sure.

- So… I would like to talk to her alone. I have to tell her what I feel, be honest and direct, and I won't be able to do that…

- If I am there too. – She completed my statement.

- Do you mind?

- No, not at all. You can talk to her; I'll do it some other time. When are you planning to talk to Tara?

- As soon as possible, but I don't want Benster near, and these days he is always around.

- No. The guy has been working out like crazy lately. When he gets to the gym you can talk to her alone, maybe Monday.

- I didn't think about that, but it is a great idea Kat. You, little smart girl.

- I know I'm such a genius! I can't help it!

- Kat, can I ask you something else?

- Sure, any more advice needed?

- No, actually I'm worried about you. You said you wanted to talk to Tara, but you've been avoiding the subject and now you just accepted so easily our deal, for you not to talk to Tara with me… So I'm wondering, are you really gonna talk to her?

She looked down to the floor and I understood.

- Then I will take that as a no, but why Kat?

- Why do you think Christian? I was her best friend, I tried to talk to her before but it seemed like she hated me even more, and every time I think about Tara I remember what we did, how stupid we were and I remember she saying…

Kat started crying, I didn't know what to do or what to say to help her, so I just let her cry.

- I remember Tara saying she felt like I stabbed her in the back – she said between sobs – Do you have any idea of how bad it made me feel?

I hugged her and she cried in my shoulder even more.

- Kat I know it is scary, I'm scared too, I want to solve this, but avoiding it is not gonna make any difference; if the things are willing to get better somehow we have to talk to Tara.

- I know, but as you said "if the things are willing to get better", what if they don't?

- Do you picture this getting worst? Tara already doesn't talk to any of us.

- I know this can get much worst Christian. I don't wanna be responsible for making this even more terrible.

- I think you are overreacting.

- Really? Does Sammy talk to you?

- Not much, why?

- Because the last time I talked to him, it was not a great chat. The guy hates us too Christian!

- He doesn't hate us; he is just hurt, like Tara. Sammy is sad because me, you and her, don't talk anymore, and we don't talk to him anymore, he feels like he is in the middle of the battlefield. And that is just another reason for you to talk to her; it's not only the way of winning Tara's friendship back, but also Sammy's.

She took a deep breath; some tears were still rolling down her chicks.

- You are right.

She said whispering and hugged me again.


	9. Chapter 9

9-Tara

That day was pretty amazing. Everything worked perfectly. Spending the whole Saturday in the beach with Sammy and Ben was a great idea for multiple reasons.

First: I loved their company, and being with them in one of my favorite places was a big combo. Second: It was a day to relax, which means no worries, no school, no teachers; a day off like that doesn't always happen. Third: It was good to stay away from Kat, Christian and Grace, in my bed that night I realized I had spent the entire day without any bad thought related to them, or anything else.

The Sunday was a normal day, I was too much nervous to do anything; I couldn't stop thinking that in less than 24 hours I would be dancing again. Okay, I wasn't ready to play Clara in the Nutcracker; I knew I would start in the bars to practice my technique and get more strength, but just to think that it was a way to be back on dance it was good enough for me.

When I woke up that Monday I had a big smile in my face, and I couldn't help it. It was decided, no one could screw my day today, hands down.

I woke up early not because I needed to but just by the fact that I couldn't pretend to be sleeping anymore. When I got downstairs to have breakfast Ben was already awake.

- Fell out of bed this morning Ben?

- I could easily ask you the same think Webster…

- Come one you know why I'm up so early.

- Knowing you as much as I do I would say it is because of your big day. Back to dance. How it feels like?

- Amazing! But anyway, why are you awake this early?

- I like to wake up early, the air feels better, and I decided to run a little, just to start the day warmed up.

- Ben that has to be a reason for you to work out that much. Don't you ever get tired?

- It is a good feeling to work out. And as you asked, yes, I have my reasons.

I looked at him suspicious and he smiled.

- Personal reasons.

- Okay then, I won't ask you anymore… for now - I said.

- Are you already going to the Academy T?

- Yep. I'll pick a fruit or something and go.

- Oh wait a second, I'm gonna take a shower and I'll go with you.

- Ben, I really want to…

- Two minutes!

He said running towards his room. I picked an apple at the kitchen just to eat something before leaving.

Ben really was fast, I don't know how someone can take a bath that fast but at least he smelled good while we were walking to the Academy.

We were the first ones to get to the class, and we decided to start warming up.

- Tara I think you should be careful!

- I'm okay Ben, my back is fine. – I said looking too him through the mirror.

- That is not what I'm talking about, it's just that you are smiling so much this morning I'm afraid you are gonna deform your face. I haven't seen a smile that big since… I don't think I have ever seen a smile that big!

- I know; I can't help it. I'm just so happy to be back.

- Sorry to make you thinks about mean stuff, but how about Saskia? Are you ready to face her again? Look in devil's eyes and keep smiling until you kill her with your happiness?

- Have I ever told you how crazy you are?

He laughed.

- I know; it's just that, I don't like that woman, actually I hate her for what she did with you, and I am worried about today. You and her…

- Don't worry Ben. I have decided that today, no one is going to make me sad, not even Saskia.

- Is good to hear that – A big smile appeared in his face like he just had a great idea - So are you ready to try something harder?

- What you mean?

He ran towards me and lifted me, but he was really careful with my back. I couldn't stop laughing for some reason. He finally put me back down.

- I think you should wait Ben; soon I will be dancing with you again, properly. And then this lift will look much better.

He chuckled at me, and I could feel I was blushing a little bit.

- I hope you are right. I want my partner back!

He lifted me again. Ben… He is so sweet; he is for sure one of a kind.


	10. Chapter 10

10-Christian

The whole walk to the Academy that morning seemed empty. I remember thinking about Tara all the way, but I couldn't focus on one single thought. More and more of them kept coming to my mind, and they always seemed worst than the one before.

I could imagine getting there and seeing Tara and Ben together, worst, I could see them kissing, I tried to shake those out of my head, but they would be replaced by something worst.

I had wake up earlier that morning, I would try to wait for Tara and hopefully go with her to the class, but when I woke up I saw Grace, and she said Tara was gone. Ben wasn't there either, that wasn't good.

When I finally got to the Academy there were few people there, I made my way towards our classroom and as I got closer I could hear voices, Tara's laughter was an amazing sound to hear, but when I got to the door and discovered the reason I got really disappointed.

Ben was lifting her around and she couldn't stop smiling. I knocked the door and they both looked at me and Tara instantly got serious, Ben continued smiling and put his arm around her. He was seriously trying to piss me off, and he was succeeding.

- Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. – I said staring at Ben.

- Don't worry Bro, join us, we are just warming up.

- I could tell Ben – I said looking at Tara now, she was looking at her feet.

For a moment I wanted to go away, just to see Tara like that, I mean, she couldn't look at me, she couldn't smile around me, but I knew she had to face it, we had to.

- I might actually accept your invitation, as I'm already here… Let's warm up.

I walked towards the bar. Ben stood next to me and Tara on his side. It was not helping at all; I had to talk to her. I should wait until he was working out, stick to Kat's plan, but I just wanted to find a way to take him away.

- Ben I almost forgot! Kat told me that your mom called Miss. Raine, she needs to talk to you, it is an urgency!

- Are you serious bro?

- Of course I'm serious bro! You should go find her! Quick!

- Ben, I think you should stay – Tara said touching his arm – Miss. Raine is probably not in her office right now.

She glanced at me, but quickly turned away. I smiled, it was a glance but still… She at least looked at me.

- So Ben. What will you do? I mean I might have taken the wrong message, you know. But I think you should be sure.

- You're right. See you guys later!

He ran out of the room, leaving his bag there.

Tara kept looking to the mirror; I looked at her through it. She glanced at me for a while, she was staring at me like saying "stop looking at me like that", I smiled at her but she didn't smile back.

- So… Are you excited? – I asked her trying to break the tension.

- About… - She said focusing on anything but me.

- Come on, today is the big day Training Bra!

She was trying not to smile I could tell it by the funny face she did, trying to control herself.

- Training Bra, is that I smile what I see?

- No.

- Yes it is! Come on, you should smile; today is one big happy day for you.

- It was being such a great day… Until…

She didn't finish the statement, but it was pretty clear.

- Say it! – I told her, turning to look at her.

Surprisingly she stopped her exercising and turned to face me. She even got closer and took a deep breath before she said anything.

- What do you want me to say? I think everything we had to tell each other have already been said.

- I don't think so. I think there are much more things you want to tell me. Good or bad Tara, if telling me what you feel is going to help, I want to know.

She stared at me, not angry, not hurt, she just seemed surprised. She was not smiling, but her face didn't seem sad either, she was just tired; Tara seemed sick of that topic.

- You want to know my feelings about this. I felt betrayed, stupid and used. I felt lonely, sad, and broke, like I would never recover from that. I felt terrible when I was at home and everybody was calling me, but I was so hurt and so mad at the world that I didn't want to talk to anyone. Anyone… But you. I was waiting for you to call.

- But I called, and you didn't answer.

- When you called me – She looked down – I was feeling different. I was with Ben that day; he gave me strength and trusted me, made me trust myself too. He made me believe I could go through this, without anyone, made me believe I was strong enough.

For a moment both of us stand there, silent. Tara sat down, and I did the same taking a sit next to her on the floor.

- Thinking about you and Kat – she said – Kills me. To see you guys together, is just… - She started to sob shyly, and then I realized she was crying – So frustrating. I trusted you, I trusted her… All I wish right now is to be okay with you guys again. I just miss both of you so bad.

She couldn't control the tears anymore. Tara had a break down right in front of me. I came closer to her trying to hold her but she pushed me away.

- I thought you said you missed me Tara.

- I do.

- So why you keep pushing me away from you?

- Because… Because I couldn't help but falling for you before. – She brought her head up and looked me in the eyes, still filled with tears - I tried but couldn't avoid it. And I know the same thing would happen now. We are not good for each other. We have been through a lot, and I can't just forget it, I can't ignore it. I would love to say we should stay friends, but I don't think we should talk at all. I miss you Christian, you have no idea, how bad I do, but things should go on this way, I don't want this to get worst.

Tara stood up and walked out of the classroom. After all she had told me I just couldn't let she slip through my fingers, so I followed her.


	11. Chapter 11

11-Tara

I was running as fast as I could, but I knew he was following me. I ran towards the park. I could hear Christian yelling my name right behind me, the sound was getting louder and he was getting closer, but I didn't want to look back. I finally felt something holding my arm. I stopped knowing I could not run anymore.

I looked at him and he seemed exhausted, he was breathing heavily.

- I told you everything Christian. Just let me go.

- Stop! – He yelled – Stop asking me to let you go! I can't, don't you understand? I love you Tara, I won't let you go, not again!

He pushed me closer and kissed me. I could feel his arms around my back trying to bring me as close as he could. I didn't want to push him away this time. To feel his lips on mine again, I just wanted to freeze that moment, when there were no worries, no problems, no one else. It was just me and him and it was enough.

When we released the kiss he kept his forehead on mine, I opened my eyes and he was smiling.

- I missed this – he said.

I was just looking at him, and I couldn't say or do anything. I didn't know what to feel or how to react.

- Tara, are you okay?

- Yeah, I guess.

Christian sat on the grass, still holding my hand; he was inviting me to do the same. I sat in front of him. I finally agreed with him, we had to talk.

- I don't know what to say now. – I said staring at him.

- You don't have to say anything Tara.

- Yes I do. For the first time I agree with you. We need to solve this. Kissing you right now brought back so many feelings and so many moments. I thought I was getting over us, but I wasn't, I was just hiding what I was feeling.

- Why? Why were you hiding it?

- Because it hurts. To be here talking to you, feeling everything again, hurts a lot.

- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for what I did to us. I was wrong.

We were silent for a few seconds, I wanted to ask him something, but just the thought was painful. I wanted to find the right words, because this doubt was in my mind since the day I discovered he and Kat kissed.

- What you felt for Kat… - He brought his head up and looked me in the eyes -was that strong enough to make you want to take the risk? Or you were just angry at me, because of that thing with your dad?

- I don't know. I thought I knew what I felt for Kat, I thought I liked her, but I don't.

- How can you be so sure? – I whispered.

- I wasn't sure before, but kissing you now, that was not what I felt when I kissed her. This feeling right now, is much more real. Is like feeling complete, feeling this is enough.

- I know how it feels like.

He intertwined his fingers on mine, and held my hand tighter.

- Do you think you'll be able to forgive me?

I was looking at him and all I wanted to do was to kiss him again. I could still feel the hurt inside of me, but part of growing and been a mature person is forgiving. It takes a lot of strength, choosing to trust someone again is not easy, but sometimes is necessary. I know I would be happier being with Christian, taking the chance was scaring but was needed.

He was clearly waiting for an answer. I came closer to him, put my hands on his face, and kissed him. I kissed him like I needed him to breath; I missed this too, just like he said. I was not forgetting what happened between him and Kat, but I would forgive him. I would forgive them, because I needed them, the distance made me sure about it. The pain… It would pass; I was strong enough to deal with it. Right now I was with him, and that was all that mattered.

We kept kissing for quite a while. By now we were already laid on the grass, but we didn't care. When we stopped to take our breaths, Christian had a wide smile in his face.

- So I'll take that as a yes.

He started kissing me again.


	12. Chapter 12

12-Christian

When she kissed me I felt like… I don't know, I can't explain… I can't tell what I felt because I'm still trying to figure out. I guess that is what people mean when they talk about love, and if it is, they are right… Love is great.

Laid there in the grass with Tara, feeling her lips on mine, knowing that this was a new beginning was one of those moments you want to keep forever. When she released the kiss and looked at me I knew she was the one.

- I think we should go. – She said.

- No, come on, let's stay.

- We can't, it is almost class time. – She stood up and extended her hand for me to take.

I hold her hand, got on my feet and looked at her.

- I wish I could stay here with you… - I said putting one of my hands in her back.

- Me too, but we have to go Christian.

I pecked her lips. She smiled shyly and turned away, she started walking and I followed her lead. We walked silent for a while, there was some sort of tension between us. I held her arm making her look at me.

- What are we? – I asked her.

- What you mean?

- I mean… Where are we now? We get to class together and if anybody asks I just want to know how to answer. So… What are we?

She seemed a little confused, a little serious and a little concerned.

- I don't know. We just…

- Kissed?

- Yeah, but it is not like we are dating.

- So you are saying…

- All I'm saying is that before anybody knows about this, we should work this out and see if we can really do this, until then I think we are friends.

- With benefits. – I said laughing.

- Kind of…

Tara smiled at my comment but continued walking, I caught up with her. She was still not talking much. I decided to make a move, so I held her hand. She instantly stopped and looked at me.

- Friends, remember?

- I know, but this is about us, me and you, nobody else. I don't care about what they'll think; I spent way too much time apart from you, now I need you close.

She was clearly blushing and I missed her shy smile. We were almost getting to the academy and we were really really close of being late. When we got to the class Tara went straight to the bars without saying anything. Ben was next to the bar, he seemed to be waiting for her to arrive, but the guy didn't seem happy at all. He greeted her and came to talk to me.

- So Christian… I talked to Miss. Raine.

- Good for you Ben.

- Yeah, she told me nobody called me. I'm guessing why you told me to find her then.

- Sorry, I might have gotten the wrong information.

- Yeah right.

He was so not buying it, but who cares? I don't at least, I did what I had to do, I got him away enough time to talk to Tara. And if anybody asks it was a misunderstanding. These things happen all the time, right?

- Class! – A woman voice said.

I turned around and it was Miss. Raine. She walked in the classroom looking pretty serious. Everybody stopped talking and turned to face her.

- I came here today bringing you some news. Saskia is not teaching this class anymore. She left the Academy to focus on her recovering; apparently her injury is not recovering properly. So from now on I'll teach this class. I'll ask you all to keep warming up and working on the bars. Abgail, this class is under you responsibility until I'm back. Now, Tara, can I talk to you for a second?

- Of course Miss. Raine.

Tara and Miss. Raine walked out of the classroom.

- I think I know what they are talking about. – Ben said.

- Really? – I looked at him – What is it?

- That thing with Tara's back… We all know it was Saskia's fault. I was there when Saskia broke Tara's back. Tara's father talked to Miss. Raine about Saskia, he was even thinking about suing the Academy if…

- If they didn't fire Saskia.

- Yes.

- Hey, Ben, Christian, I'm sure you heard it but I'll repeat, I'm in command now so both of you better starting working. – Abgail demanded.

I nodded yes, and so did Ben, I really didn't want to discuss with Abgail. Tara and Miss. Raine talked for a few minutes before entering the class again. I looked over to Tara just to check if she was ok, she noticed my look and smiled at me.


	13. Chapter 13

13-Tara

I tried to focus on my exercising on the bars, but all I could thing about was Miss. Raine and the talk we just had. She told me that Saskia assumed it was her fault; she assumed she had hurt my back. She apologized and decided to pull out her job on the Academy. I was happy I wouldn't have to see her face again, at least for a while. Miss. Raine also apologized for not trusting me at first. I couldn't believe this. Monday was getting way better than I thought it would be.

That class was one of the best I had in a long time. Saskia was not there, I was dancing again and I could finally look at Christian and Kat without wanting to cry my eyes out in front of everybody.

When the class ended Ben came to talk to me.

- So, was this everything you thought it would be?

- No… It was better! – I said cheerfully.

- I guess Saskia not being here is a big plus.

- Yes it is. But there are other things…

- As such… - He looked at me suspicious.

- As such as… Me and Christian. – His eyes popped up, he looked so shocked - Okay, we had agreed we would work this out, but I have to tell some one or I'll explode and you are the person that I most trust in the whole world right now. So, I decided to do what you said.

- Sorry T, remind me of what I said please.

- You told me that I should talk to him!

- Yes, I meant talk, not you guys getting back together.

- It just happened… and I'm so happy that I followed your advice. You were totally right about this.

Ben was looking at me with a sad face.

- What is wrong Ben?

- Nothing, I just… I don't get it. I thought you were sad and hurt, are you sure it is healthy for you to be back with him already?

- Ben I can't believe you are saying this…

- I'm just thinking about you T. I don't want him to break you again.

- Thank you Ben, that is so sweet. You are the best friend anyone could ever ask for!

- Yes… Friend…

I hugged him, but I could still feel he was sad. I saw over Ben's shoulder Christian coming.

- Hey Training Bra… Ben! – He looked over me and than at Ben.

- Hi. – I said smiling.

Ben didn't say anything, and didn't look at Christian either.

- Tara are you free this afternoon? Sammy and I were making some plans and we were counting on you! – Ben said ignoring Christian presence.

- Why didn't you tell me anything before?

- We wanted to make it a surprise, but now I just want to be sure you don't have any other plans.

I looked back and forth at Christian and Ben. None of them was smiling; they were actually with pretty serious/angry faces which I didn't get.

- Okay Ben, I guess I can. Where and when will we meet?

- I'll see you after lunch on the residence, we can go from there.

- Okay!

He hugged me and left with his head down without saying anything. Christian turned to face me and held on of my hands.

- I had made some plans too, but I guess he was faster than me.

- What you mean Christian?

- Tara I told you that before, and I'll tell you again. Ben is falling for you.

- No he is not.

- Tara, everybody can see it, he is in love with you and considering our situation right now I don't think it is a good idea to…

- Stop right there okay? Ben is a great friend, and I'll continue to hang out with him you like it or not. There is nothing to worry about. Plus we agreed we are not dating seriously yet. And this is not a good way to start off. Just trust me that nothing is going on between me and him, okay?

- Okay – He kissed my forehead – But I still don't like the way he looks at you.

- You are probably just making it out of your head.

He held my hand and we started to walk out of the classroom. There was only one person in the class yet: Kat. She froze when she saw us and nobody said anything for a few seconds. I knew it was time to talk to her. If I could forgive Christian I could for sure forgive Kat.

- Hey Kat. – I said trying to be as natural as I could.

- Hi. – She was obviously uncomfortable.

- Girls I think I will just leave you alone, I have to do… Something… That I… Hum… Bye. – Christian was acting just as awkward as both of us.

- So, long time no talk Kat. – I said.

- Yes…

She seemed surprised we were talking. There was a heavy tension in the air so I decided to break the ice and get to the subject.

- Look I'll get straight to the point Kat.

- Please do that.

- I talked to Christian, and I think now is time to talk to you.

- You want to talk? Really?

- Yeah… - I took a few seconds to find the words, I needed to tell her everything I was feeling - Kat, you are a big piece of my life, and living apart from you was killing me, because don't matter how bad things were, or how wrong we all were about this, being apart was not helping at all. I missed you.

Kat was not moving or showing any feeling in her face, she just seemed shocked. Was that a good or a bad sign?

- Say something, please? – I begged.

- I missed you too. – She said almost in a whisper.

She hugged me tight and we both started to cry.

- I missed you so bad T! I was so scared of what you would say, that is why I couldn't talk to you – She said hugging me even tighter – I was wrong and I'm so sorry about everything. I was so afraid you'd never forgive me.

- It was tough – I said releasing the hug to look at her – But the thing is that I need you, so I had to get over it. Everybody makes mistakes Kat, but doesn't matter how big the mistake was, I would be making one even worst if I didn't forgive you. You are my best friend, my sister; I'm not letting a boy get in between us.

- Me and Christian… We tried for a while… But it didn't work out at all. I'm so sorry T.

She hugged me again, and we stand there crying like two little girls for a while. To feel Kat so close to me again was like breathing fresh air, I was finally out of that confusion and I could see things clear.


	14. Chapter 14

14-Christian

I could only hope that they were okay by now. God… The things I would give to be a fly on that hallway. I was really anxious to figure out what they were talking, and if everything was fine again. In the end, it was kind of my fault they broke apart.

I was walking over to the residence with my mind filled with those thoughts when I suddenly ran into someone.

- I'm so sorry… - and then I saw who it was – Oh, it is you Ben, didn't see you there. - I would keep walking but he held my arm.

- We need to talk Christian.

- Does it need to be _now_?

- Yes.

He walked away from the residence and I decided to follow him. We walked for a while and got to the park. It was the second time today I was there, but I was sure my conversation with wouldn't be like the one I had with Tara.

- Why are we here Ben?

- I need to talk to you, and I didn't want anyone else near.

- Okay, what is that you have to talk to me?

Ben was looking pretty angry, and it is so not his usual look, he is always smiling and being Mr. Nice Guy.

- I talked to Tara.

- You've been doing that a lot Ben.

- Does it bother you Christian? That I'm so close to her?

- Actually, yes it does.

- Why is that? – He crossed him arms.

- Because I…

- You and her, you are together again.

He already knew… Tara had obviously told him.

- Hum… Yes, but that is not of your business.

- Actually it is. What are you trying to do Christian? You hurt her enough don't you think? We both know this is not going to work out, and she clearly deserves better than be heartbroken again.

- And I'm guessing you would be better for her? Come one…

- I'm sure I will. I was there for her all this time. I still don't know how you could do that to her. You couldn't even tell her, she had to discover it by herself. I was there, and if hearing you and Kat talking was shocking for me, imagine how bad it was for her.

- It was your fault she discovered it like that! You handle her that walkie talkie.

- Do you hear what you are saying dude? You can't be serious about this. You are blaming me for something that you did, better, something that you didn't have the guts to do. You have to start assuming your mistakes, grow up Christian.

- That is what you had to tell me? To grow up?

- No… Here is what I had to tell you. Tara is an amazing girl; all I want is for her to be happy, her life is finally coming back to place right now and if you screw that again you'll have problems with me. Got it?

- Look at you, being the protector. I think you are not getting it Benster, you are not her boyfriend, I am.

- That can change any time, if I were you, I would treat her well and enjoy this, until she realizes who he really is better for her.

Ben walked away from me; he clearly thought he had won. He had just told me he likes Tara, and warned that he would obviously try to take her from me. Who does he think he is?

I couldn't make Tara stay away from him, she was really clear telling me she wouldn't and she didn't believe me when I told her that he really likes her. This afternoon they were going to hang out… But Sammy would be there, so hopefully nothing would happen. My only choice was probably do what Tara said: trust her word that nothing was going on between them.

After a few minutes a decided to go back to the residence too. When I was almost getting there I saw Sammy.

- Hey Sammy!

- Hi – He was breathing heavily, I guess he was running.

- What were you doing?

- Some exercising with Ollie. He is helping me getting ready for the Prix de Fonteyn.

- Oh… Ollie. How are the things going between you guys?

- We are trying… sometimes is hard to understand him, and he is just so competitive in everything. Ollie keeps picking up on small things, telling me everything I'm doing wrong!

- I'm sure you guys will work that out.

- I hate those words.

- Which ones?

- _Work_ and _out_, I have been hearing them a lot. The guy doesn't give me a break, looks like he wants me to get in the Prix more than I do. When I don't have classes I'm always doing some sort of training with him.

- Sammy…You want me to believe that everything you do with your boyfriend is training? Come on.

Sammy couldn't help but smile; he was even blushing a little which was kind of weird to see.

- Sammy, I just wanted to tell you that I talked to Tara, and everything is alright… And I'm sorry for making you feel excluded and lonely.

- You talked to her?

- Yes…

- And everything is fine?

- Yes… That is what I said.

Sammy opened a big smile and hugged me.

- It is good to know that, things might get back to normal now… - He said releasing the hug.

- Hopefully, I was tired of all that drama.

- Yeah, me too. Hey I'm going to have some lunch now, probably just grab something to eat at the café, do you want to join me?

- Sure.

It was weird to have Sammy talking to me again; maybe everything he wanted was things to get back like they were. I had to admit to myself, everything I wanted was that too.


	15. Chapter 15

15-Tara

I was having lunch at the residence when I saw Ben coming through the door. He seemed really angry.

- Hey Ben.

Ben looked startled, like I had just woke him from a dream. He turned around to look at me and faked a smile.

- Hi T!

- What is wrong? Where are you going?

- Nothing, everything is fine. I'm going to take a bath so we can go to your little surprise!

- Yeah! I'm so excited about it.

- You _should_ be. I'll be fast, I promise.

I finished eating and got upstairs to change. Grace was there.

- Hey T… Can I ask you something?

- What? – I answered not looking at her.

- What is going on?

- With…

- This. Every time I try to talk to you, you give me half answers; never look me in the eyes. When you got back to the academy everything was fine and some weeks later you just started acting like this.

I turned to look at her. I couldn't believe she was really playing dumb to me.

- Are you seriously pretending you don't know?

- I'm not pretending… I don't know what happened.

- I know Grace… About everything. The thing you did with my point shoes, the intrigues you created with Kat and Abgail… I know you told the whole school about what happened with Kat and Christian. I don't get it, is this funny too you? Because if it is, you have some serious problems going on.

- Okay, I admit the first two ones, but I didn't tell the entire school what happened, who told you that?

- Hum… let me thing… Everybody.

- I didn't, you have to trust me!

- Trust you?

- I thought we were friends Tara.

- Me too.

I gave up on changing and just left the room leaving her alone. When I got downstairs Ben was in the couch waiting for me.

- For a second a thought you would leave me here. – He said.

- I wouldn't do that. So… What is the big surprise?

- You'll see.

He put his arm around my waist, guiding me to the door.

We walked out of the Residence and there was a cab waiting for us. Ben opened the door for me.

- Milady… please take your seat.

- You are really not telling me where we're going?

- Nope.

- How about Sammy?

- He couldn't make it. He is going to meet Ollie this afternoon, but I wouldn't turn your surprise down because of a small thing like that.

He entered after me and gave the driver a little paper, probably with the address. When we got to the destination I was kind of surprised. For some reason Ben had got me to the Opera House.

- Ben, what are we doing here? Can we even _be_ here?

- Of course we can… I made some calls.

He paid the driver and took my hand.

- Ready for your surprise?

- I think so.

We ran up the Opera House stairs and in a few minutes we were at the stage. We were the only ones there. Ben turned the light on, and one big spotlight shined in the center of the stage.

- Do you remember when you told me that once you were here with Ethan, and he made you feel like you were flying?

- Of course I remember. I'm surprised that _you_ remember it!

- Of course I do. It reminded me of when I started dancing because of the whole cancer thing. I felt like I was out of the world, nothing could touch me, no one could bring me down, it was like…

- Flying. – I completed his statement, stunned by his honesty.

- And that takes us to your big surprise. – He said coming closer to me – When I say dancing what comes to your mind?

- Effort, pain, ballet… - I started to think about it deeply - But also, happiness, freedom, power… Wait, why am I answering this?

- You'll find out. What did you feel when you thought you wouldn't dance again?

The question took me by surprise. I wish I knew why Ben was making that interrogatory.

- I don't know, I felt like I couldn't breathe, like someone had taken a part of me, I felt heavy like I couldn't walk anymore.

- That is why we are here. You are back now Tara and you can dance again. You can breath again,

- I still don't get it.

- I decided to recreate that moment you had with Ethan, but a little different…

- So you mean we are going to fly?

- Kind of. Come here. – He invited me to join him in the spotlight – You see this place… Someday this theater will be filled with people, and they are all going to be here to see you. So before that happens a think we should practice for your big moment.

He ran to take something out of his bag. There was a pair of point shoes.

- I thought you said we would fly…

- We will… We will dance.

- But I don't know if I can dance Ben, my back is…

- You said you miss dancing.

- Of course I do.

- Then there is no better place to start again than here.

He handled me the point shoes, and turned some music on, but I couldn't recognize the melody.

- I don't know this song, how are we going to dance?

- The same way we would fly… Just follow the wind Tara.

He held my hand and we started dancing. There was no choreography, or teacher or audience… It was just me and him dancing. I missed dancing like that, dancing for the joy of it, not for the perfection, or for anybody else. This time, I was dancing for me.


	16. Chapter 16

16-Christian

Having lunch with Sammy was incredibly fun. I missed hanging out with him, talking to him, I missed his company.

After we ate at the café we took a walk, just chatting since we hadn't talked much those days. When it was about 2p.m. something suddenly popped in my mind.

- Sammy, aren't you late for something?

- No… I mean, I have practice with Ollie at the studio but it will only start in one hour. Why?

- Didn't you have to meet Tara and Ben?

- No…

- Some sort of surprise you and Ben have been planning for her?

- I didn't plan any surprise for Tara. I don't know what you are talking about.

- What you mean you don't know what I'm talking about? Ben told me you and him… I can't believe this!

- Christian what is going on?

- Sammy I have to go okay? See you later.

- No, tell me, what is going on?

- I'll tell you… later!

- Ok but…

I started to run towards the residence. Ben. I can't believe he did that, he wanted to be alone with Tara, that talk this morning, it was his way of telling me he was up to something.

When I got to the residence I saw Abgail, she was singing, for some bizarre reason that I really didn't want to ask. She stopped instantly when she saw me coming in.

- Don't you know how to knock?

- Where is Tara?

- What is the problem with you? You come here…

- Where is Tara?

I think she realized I was serious about this.

- I don't know, the last time I saw her was more than one hour ago. She left with Ben. Why? What is going on? Christian, don't leave me here talking alone…

I left the residence but when I got to the street I didn't know what to do, I probably couldn't do anything. She was out with Ben, but I had no idea where they were, or what they were doing.

I decided to search in the most obvious places. I looked in the Academy, in the park, in the café, in the beach. Nothing.

I didn't know why I was so worried, it wasn't like she was with a serial killer, she wasn't in danger, but I probably was. He was probably trying something with her.

That thought gave me chills. I had just won Tara back; I couldn't bare to think that in the same day Ben could take her from me. It took really long to finally talk to her, now that I'm starting to win her trust back something like this happens. I knew she would be angry if I did something about Ben, she didn't want me to get in middle their little "friendship", and I wouldn't if I knew they really were just friends. She asked me to trust her. I do trust her; it is Ben I don't trust.

The rest of the afternoon for me was just a big and frustrating talk to myself, it was like having an angel in one shoulder and a little devil in the other, both of them couldn't stop talking, but they were always saying contradictive things.

By the sunset I thought I had put my mind on its place and was ready to go back to the residence to see Tara and kill Ben. For my disappointment when I got there they hadn't arrived yet, which made me feel even worse. In a little time it would be dark and they were still out. I went to my room and Sammy was laid in his bed, hopefully he was alive but I couldn't tell just looking at him.

- Hey Sammy, are you okay?

He did kind of a noise, I don't what was it. He turned to the other side of the bed and I got he didn't want to talk; whatever that training with Ollie was it was killing Sammy slowly.

_**Author's note: I wanted to thank you so much guys for the reviews! Your support is my reason to keep writing! You are amazing! xo**_


	17. Chapter 17

17-Tara

- Do you have any idea of how much I missed this? – I asked still dancing in the spotlight.

Ben had already stopped. He had been watching me for a few minutes. He didn't answer my question, and just kept staring at me speechless.

- Ben, are you there? – I stopped dancing and looked at him.

He walked over to me, but he kept the eye contact, his look was giving me chills, but it was a good feeling.

- I thought you were a good dancer Tara… But you are not good – I was shocked by his words but then he smiled at my face – You are great! You are a gifted person, and just to watch you dancing, it is like I could feel everything you feel, like we had a connection.

- Thanks Ben. – It was all I could say, I knew I was blushing.

- So you liked your surprise?

- Are you kidding me? Of course I did! – I hugged him tight.

- I'm glad. – He said cheerfully and lifting me a little - How about your back? Does it hurt after all this dancing?

- No, it feels great! Thank you for this. It was perfect.

I finally released the hug and he looked at me deep in the eyes. It was a different feeling to have Ben so close to me; I could even feel his breath on my face. He started to bend down at me. No, this could not be happening; Ben was seriously not trying to do that…

- Ben! – I stopped him putting one of my hands in his chest, he looked surprised – I think it is time for us to go.

His face turned sad, was he really trying to kiss me?

- Ben? Are you listening to me? We have been here for what, two, maybe three hours?

- I guess, maybe more. – He said whispering.

- It is probably getting dark out there. We should go.

- Okay…

He turned away and walked over to where his bag was. Now I was sure he tried to kiss me, that is why he was acting so weird. I took out the point shoes and handled them to him.

- Ben… What is going on?

- Nothing Tara! Everything is fine.

He turned his back to me and walked out of the stage but I held his arm.

- Ben, come on, talk to me! What is going on?

- What do you want me to say Tara? – He turned to face me. His face was a mix of emotions now, sadness and angriness for the most part.

- The truth, I want to understand what is going on Ben. You were trying to… - I couldn't even say it, the idea looked so confuse to me.

- I wasn't trying to do anything! You are right, we should probably go!

I was scared now not only by his tone but also by the way he was looking at me. I think he realized he left me disappointed, so came closer and started to talk in his normal voice.

- Sorry – He hugged me – Nothing is going on Tara. That was not the way today was supposed to end – He let go of the hug, but then extended his hand for me to take – Let's go now?

I took his hand and nodded yes with my head; we left the Opera House and took a cab to get back to the residence. It was quite a silence ride, and when we got there it was already dark. I was about to enter the building when Ben held my arm.

- Before you go in there, I wanted to explain what happened in the stage this afternoon.

- Okay. – I whispered.

- I wasn't trying to do anything, to force anything, I just felt like…

- Ben we really don't need to talk about this.

- Yes, we do! Look Tara, I feel different when I'm around you, and I like that feeling. And I know you only see me as a friend now, but… I don't. I can't see you as a friend anymore.

- You know right now I can't do this Ben.

- I know… - He looked down.

- Me and Christian, we… - I couldn't find the right words to describe it - It is complicated.

- He'll hurt you Tara. I can't let that happen again. Can't you see he is not good for you?

- You don't know that!

- Yes, I do. I'm sure. As you said you and him are complicated. Real love is not complicated. I mean, look at us, everything is so simple.

- Ben, I love you, but as a friend. If nothing was going on with Christian, maybe we could…

- No Tara – he interrupted me, his voice getting louder again - I don't want a maybe. I want a yes or no. What is it going to be?

- You can't be doing this. – I said shocked.

- But I am.

I looked at him; I couldn't believe he was making me choose. I couldn't choose between Ben and Christian, they are opposites in so many ways, and I love both of them, but there are different kinds of love. I could keep looking at him the whole night, begging with my eyes, wishing he would come back in his question, but Ben wasn't saying anything, so I had to answer.

- It is a no.

He looked at me disappointed and entered the residence without saying anything else. This was certainly not the right ending for that perfect day. The worst part is that when he left I could feel part of me left with him and I didn't know why.

Even with the bad ending the rest of the day was pretty awesome and the surprise Ben put together for me was incredible. He was right; there was no better place to start again than on that stage. Playing back our moments on my head I could imagine we dancing to a big audience and we would get standing ovation in the end. It might seem silly but it was like my home was there, like I belonged on that stage.

I walked in right after him, there were a few people in the break room, but Christian wasn't there, or Kat. I decided to go upstairs and take a shower. When I got to the room Grace was there again.

- Tara, where have you been all day?

- Why should I tell you?

- I was worried. No one knew where you were.

- Grace you don't need to pretend you care about me. I got you; you don't care about anyone but yourself.

She got out of her bed and came closer so she could face me.

- You don't know me Tara, you just think you do. I might do things that you don't understand but I didn't do what you are accusing me. I never told anyone about what happened between Kat and Christian.

- You lie all the time Grace, why should I believe you now?

- Look at my eyes. Do I look like I'm lying? You forgave Kat even after her huge mistake, she betrayed you, now you are blaming me for something that I didn't do and even if I had Tara, shouldn't you forgive me too?

I looked at Grace. I knew she could be such a fake person sometimes and lie to make things better for herself, but for some reason I felt like she was telling the truth. I couldn't say I would be her BFF, but it was terrible being in the same room with a person that I can't even look at.

- You're right.

- Am I? Really?

- I guess we can try… Is just that I can't figure you out Grace! I feel like I don't know you, and that I can expect anything from you. I don't get why you do the things you do.

- I don't get it either most of the time. I know it is hard to be my friend. Sometimes I find it hard to be myself with people so I keep my mask, but I feel like I can be the real Grace with you. So, are we friends?

She opened her arms like waiting for a hug.

- Sure…

I hugged her. Thinking better I couldn't be sure she had spread those rumors, anyone could have, but I wasn't going to be so naïve to trust her completely all at once, I was learning with my mistakes, and God, I had lots of them. When I went to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror there was a different Tara there. Not better or worst, just different.


	18. Chapter 18

18-Christian

As Sammy had slept in the middle of our conversation (well, call it monologue if you like, as I was the only one talking) so I decided to go downstairs have dinner. I felt silly talking to a boy that wasn't even awake, but I had to tell someone what was in my mind, even if the person wasn't hearing any of the words I was saying.

When I got to the kitchen I saw Ben there with a glass of water. Suddenly a wave of angriness ran through my body. I wish I could kill him right in that moment, but first I wanted him to give me some explanations.

- So… You are finally back. – I said surprising him.

He looked at me but didn't answer. He tried to walk away but I got in front of him.

- Not that fast Benster. I need you to explain some things.

- I don't own you any explanations.

- I think you do. So here is what I want to know. What were you doing with _my girlfriend _all afternoon? Nobody knew where you guys were… Not even Sammy that was supposed to be with you. Isn't that right Ben?

- I was trying to make a surprise for her, trying to make her day special, not that I expect you to understand that.

- Because I'm not sensible like you Ben?

- No, because you don't care about her like I do.

- Really? I think she disagrees.

- Get out of my way Christian. – He said trying to push me.

- No, no, no. I haven't finished yet.

- But I have!

- Sorry, you didn't answer my question. Where were you? What were you doing?

- That is none of your business.

- This is about Tara, so it is my business.

- You want to know? Ask her. I'm sure she will give you the details, unless she needs to hide something from you, something that she might be struggling to accept.

Now he was starting to get me mad, what did he mean by that?

- What are you trying to say Ben?

- Nothing specific, is just that I think Tara have some doubts in her mind after today. If I were you I would be a little worried, she might don't see it now, but sooner or later she will figure out what is right in front of her. And then she will make the right choice. – He had a cocky smile in his face.

- So let's make a deal Ben, until this big choice happens, stay away from my girlfriend.

- Not gonna happen.

He finally walked out of the kitchen, and now I knew for sure something had happened this afternoon.

I didn't know if I could still eat something, I was not hungry anymore. I decided to eat a cupcake, one of the zillions Kat had made a time ago. She always do those when she is sad, the last time, she spent the whole night doing them.

I sat in the couch to watch TV, but that was nothing really interesting so I turned it off. Suddenly I felt a pair of hands cover my eyes.

- Guess who it is! – I heard a girl voice, it was clearly Tara's.

I held her hands and pulled her, making Tara fall on the couch right over me. She chuckled and I kissed her.

When we stopped kissing she smiled and kissed my cheek, her legs still on my lap.

- Did you miss me? – She asked me.

- Couldn't you tell? – I pecked her lips.

- Just checking. – She said smiling.

She got her legs out of my lap and sat closer to me. I embraced her and for a moment everything was silent.

- Tara?

- Yes – She said laying her head on my shoulder.

- Where were you this afternoon?

- At my surprise, don't you remember?

- I know that, but _where_ were you?

- Oh, we were at the Opera House.

What? Ben had got her to the Opera House? How did that happen?

- Christian, are you okay?

- Hum… Yeah. He got you to the Opera House. What was the surprise then?

- We just danced. But it was good you know, to be on that stage, dancing again after all this time.

- Yes, sure. So was that all, nothing else happened?

Tara looked worried after that question; she looked down and didn't answer me. What did Ben try with her?

_**Author's Note: Hope you all enjoy! This will probably get interesting! Thanks for the reviews! **_


	19. Chapter 19

19-Tara

Christian's question got me frozen. What should I answer? Lie to him and pretend that nothing happened? Tell him he was right all this time and that Ben really tried to kiss me?

- Tara, did something else happen? – He repeated the question and now his tone was clearly more serious.

- No, nothing really happened.

- What you mean by _really_ happened?

This was getting tougher. I knew that if Christian knew what me and Ben talked about he was going to be angry, he is pretty explosive. But wouldn't it be worst if he discovered it by someone else? Nothing happened in the end, so wasn't it better for him to know what was going on by me?

- Look, Christian… Me and Ben, we… - I couldn't find the right words.

- You, what Tara? – His voice was getting louder.

- We were talking about… things.

- Which things?

- Me, you… Him. – He was probably imagining lots of bad things in his mind so I decided to go straight to the point – Look you were right okay, about Ben and his feelings about me.

He took a deep breath and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

- What did he do? – He said gazing deep in my eyes, like he wanted to read my mind.

- Nothing!

- Tara, tell me, what did he do?

- He didn't do anything okay? We just talked.

I couldn't tell him about the almost kiss; it would have bad consequences for everyone. I knew Christian was not buying it though.

- Look, Christian, nothing happened. We just talked and I might even have gotten the wrong idea about it.

- No you didn't.

- How can you know?

- I know, because Ben talked to me this morning. He was pretty clear. Do you want to know what he said?

- I can imagine myself, so no, thanks.

Christian turned his body and stared at wall; it was like he was so mad he couldn't look at me.

- Nothing is going to change because of this right? Nothing happened.

He looked at me while I was trying my best puppy face to make him give up on whatever he was thinking of doing.

- No. Nothing is going to get in between us. – He kissed my forehead – But… - He seemed tense, like he was about to say something he really didn't want to.

- But what?

- But… I think you should stay away from him.

His words hit me like a punch in the stomach. Suddenly I felt a pressure in my chest, and my heart was heavier. What Ben did wasn't the right thing, he knew I was trying to get back with Christian, but I couldn't just leave him, not after everything he did for me, and for sure not after today. He was there all this time, giving me the strength I hadn't, making me more confident, making me more perseverant… Okay, things would be really weird from now on, but we could get over it and there was no reason that seemed good enough for me to avoid him. I needed Ben.

- Tara, did you hear what I said? – Christian said waking me from my thoughts.

- Yes… - I whispered looking in his eyes, irresistible begging eyes – I can't do what you are asking me to.

It was tough to tell him that, but it was tougher to see his reaction, it was like his face turned gray and he was all disappointment. But I couldn't lie to him and I couldn't lie to myself either, so I couldn't tell him I would stay away from Ben. The friendship we have now is strong and special; I'm not gonna be the one to destroy that.

- Why? – Was all he could say, the words came out in a whisper.

- He is my friend. I need his friendship now. – I said whispering with my head down.

- Look at me Tara! – He said it a little too loud, some people around even left the room – He was using this friendship thing to get to you. God, he lied to you about Sammy. I was with Sammy this afternoon; he didn't know a thing about this stupid surprise!

- What? No, Sammy just couldn't make it, because of Ollie and…

- _No_! Sammy didn't know about this. He planed this so he could be alone with you! He just never thought we would be dating again by today. He is such a liar, how can you want to be even friends with someone like that?

I wanted to cry over everything he was telling me, but I wasn't going to, because I knew they were all lies. Ben was a great person, and if he ever did any of those things they weren't meant to be some kind of evil plan like Christian was saying.

- First – I said with the calmest voice I could fake – don't talk about him like that again. You don't know Ben well, so you don't have that right. Second I told you to trust me; I told you that I would still be friends with Ben and I told you that we should wait to see how we would do until we get this thing like a real relationship. – He was about to interrupt me but I continued - But a relationship needs trust and communication, and as you obviously didn't hear any of the things I said I don't have to sit here and listen to this either.

I left the living room and made my way upstairs, tired of everything. I went to my room, climbed my bed and closed my eyes, wishing I could be back in the Opera House, in my perfect day, in my perfect moment…

_**Author's note: Hope you have liked it! If you did, please let me know! *-***_


	20. Chapter 20

20-Christian

I tried to sleep but I couldn't. I tried to talk to Tara the other day, but her words just seemed cold. But more frustrating than all of this, was not getting what she said. I understood her words that night, but they didn't make sense for me. That was officially the shortest "relationship" ever. It started on the morning and by the night it was over.

I spent the rest of the week trying to make things feel normal, but she was avoiding me. I couldn't take her hand, give her a hug, and for sure I couldn't kiss her. And I had to deal with Ben's looks, and superiority smiles. I'm sure he realized how things had changed between me and Tara and I could tell he loved it.

At least during a week Tara avoided him too. She still talked to Ben, but just like her talks with me every word seemed cold and distant. Although I knew she was not doing it because of my request it was still good to see them less close.

One week went by like that. I was okay with it… Fine… It wasn't exactly the way I wanted things to be like, but I had to give her some time. Knowing Tara she would eventually get calm and think this better. Plus she didn't say we were over.

Then the second week passed and I started to get worried. I was not desperate yet, if I could make Tara talk to me after everything we went through before, this Ben thing shouldn't be much of a problem. I just had to make the right moves and don't underestimate him. Ben had proved me he wasn't just the goofy and funny guy he seemed to be. There was another side of him that would for sure come out if it would help him to get what he wanted.

I couldn't blame him for that. We all have some hidden side or past, and Ben's was not even that bad. He wasn't evil, I had to admit; he was just really smart. Weird, I can't believe I really just said that about Ben.

It had been already two weeks, three days and seven hours after our argument, but who was really counting? Okay, I'll admit. I was starting to get nervous; Tara seemed to be disappearing with Kat making it impossible for us to talk. My level of despair came to a point with no return when I did the unpredictable and unacceptable. I decided to talk to Ben. Our first class this Friday had no girls so it was the perfect place to ask him what I had to, without having Tara or Kat near.

I walked in the studio and there were five guys there. One of them was Ben, who was warming up in the bars.

- Ben. – He looked surprised but kind of ignored me and focused on his exercising.

- I'm talking to you Ben. – He ignored again, turning his back to me, facing the mirror.

- Look. I need to talk to you about Tara.

He stopped exercising, took a deep breath and looked at me.

- I'm listening.

- Well… – I stopped for a second and his face seemed worried – Tara hasn't been talking to me much. Has she talked to you?

- That is what you had to ask me?

- Just answer.

- Ok… No. Why?

- Because she is ignoring me too and I'm starting to get worried. Did she tell you anything?

- No. But I think I know what happened.

- Really?

- Yeah, I heard you guys had an argument. I think I know why. – He smiled ironically.

- Do you? What do you think was it about?

- Me.

He looked at me with a little smile. And for my frustration he was right. It was him, and his stupid surprise.

- So, I can now tell I'm right – he said pointing at my face – Then what did you talked about me?

- About the same things you told me that morning and the same things I told you that night. I think I underestimated you Benjamin. But you are clearly wrong about something.

- That would be?

- Tara choosing you over me.

- I don't think I was that wrong. 'Cause if I was; why would she be avoiding you?

- She is confused. She refuses to stay away from you, for some reason. Soon her head will be back on its place.

- I don't know. I think this "confusion", is that what you are calling it? Well, anyway, this is just Tara realizing how much she likes me.

The look on his face broke every single barrier I had built to hold back my angriness. The next words came to my mind like a hurricane and ran out of my mouth louder than expected.

- You are crazy if you really believe that. I don't know how Tara can be so naïve. She is refusing to see the liar you are, the way you fooled her that day. You had all settled up, hadn't you?

- You are calling me a liar, so let me refresh your mind Christian. Remember in the regional competition for the Prix de Fonteyn? Do you remember what happened?

- I can't believe you are bringing that up again.

- No, I want you to tell me. I remember you ignoring Tara's problems with her back. – His voice was getting louder, just like mine, and then both of us were yelling.

- But she told me it was just a stretched muscle. – I was becoming desperate, it was the feeling those memories always brought me.

- I remember you buying Kat good luck gifts while Tara was struggling to get better, to do well, without any support from you. I remember sitting in that stair with her while she was about to pull out of the competition, you weren't there with her. _I was_. Who were you with Christian? – I couldn't answer anything else; all the words ran out of my mind – Oh right, Kat. You were with her.

- It wasn't like that Ben. – I tried not to stumble over the words - I didn't know what Tara was going through.

- Of course you didn't. You didn't care and you still don't. You are too selfish to think about anyone but you. Going back and forth between best friends? That is so childish. When I was there sitting with Tara and seeing her face while she heard you saying those things, about kissing Kat, about it being something you wanted to do for a long time. I could only imagine how she felt… Betrayed and stupid!

For a moment he stayed silent looking at me still angry, like he hadn't said everything he had to. By his tone I could tell he had been holding it back for a long time, in part he was right. Tara told me how she felt and it was like I could hear her voice now, saying everything again in my mind.

- Are you done? – I hear Patrick's voice, it was loud and angry.

Me and Ben turned to him. He had his arms crossed in front of his chest, and that disappointed look on his face. The rest of the guys in the class were either serious or trying to hold their laughter.

- Sorry Patrick, we didn't realize that you had already arrived. – Ben said taking one step closer to the teacher.

- That I could tell. Your attitude is disrespectful and unacceptable in this class. When you solve your personal problems you might be allowed back in my class, but for today I want both of you out. This better be the last time something like this happens, because I really don't want to give this problem for Miss. Raine to solve. Understood?

We both nodded with our heads and left the room. Ben started to walk faster away from me, but our conversation was so not over yet.

I followed him down the hallway and when he realized it he stopped looking just as mad as he was in class.

- Will you ever leave me alone? I'm tired of you!

- After all you said did you really think you could just leave?

- I told what I had to. But that argument was pointless because you'll just keep ignoring everything I said. The truth!

- I know okay! – I yelled and he looked startled – I know I was wrong, I know how bad I hurt Tara, I know! But I can't and I won't stay away from her, and I'm not giving up, because I'm not only doing this for me, I'm also doing it for her. I love her. I _really love_ her, and you might think I don't but you don't know me or what I feel. I've been through a lot with her, and I tried to deny it but I love Tara – I tried to stop but the words just kept coming – I'm not letting some guy that just entered in her life screw that, I won't let _you_ screw that. It doesn't matter how hard you try. You are right about what happened with Kat, but I will do my best to win her trust back. To win her love back, and if all you want is for her to be happy than you should stay out our way. If this goes wrong, _fine_ take your chance, until then don't make things harder for all of us. This is about Tara, whatever happens it has to be her choice, so stop trying to choose for her.

Ben didn't say anything else, but he looked different, he just turned away with his head down and walked away from me. I stood there, taking my breath back, still trying to believe in the things I had just told Ben. I was truly honest with him and I could only hope he had listened.


	21. Chapter 21

21-Tara

Me, Kat and Abigail were warming up that morning. Grace wasn't in the class, again. She was in Miss. Raine's office, solving some family problems. Dad stuff probably. The weird part was now Abigail. Don't get me wrong, it was a good weird. She was closer to me and Kat now, she would never admit it, but I think she really likes us. I don't blame her; a time ago I wouldn't admit how much I like her either.

- So T, how are the things going with Christian? – Kat asked out of the blue.

- Kat, where did that come from? – I asked surprised.

- Problems in heaven Tara? – Abigail looked surprised.

- I wouldn't call it heaven Abigail… And girls do we really have to talk about this?

- Yes T, we do. Christian asked me about you, and why you are avoiding him, and I didn't know what to answer.

- What did you say Kat? – I asked afraid of what she could have answered.

- Nothing, all I said was that I wasn't going to get in the middle of your fight.

- Fight? – Abigail looked surprised – You guys had a fight? Is that why he was so desperate looking for you that day? Looks like is not only my love life that is a total wreck.

- Not a fight Abigail. – I answered trying to ignore the last part - We had a little argument but we both said things that we shouldn't. Or maybe we should because they were true but, it was hard to have that argument with him, and it was worst because it involved other people.

- Then why didn't you guys talk that out already T? – Kat came closer to me.

- I don't know. I'm afraid of talking to him and having another argument, to make this even harder.

- But you want to solve things with him, right? I mean, do you want to be with him? – It was still weird to be so honest and close to Abigail, but I had to trust her a little bit, so I had to answer.

- Yes, I think I do. I mean I don't know. It is always so hard to be with him. Should love be that complicated? – I stopped talking when I realized I was saying the same things Ben had told me that night.

None of the girls answered immediately. I heard steps, and it was Miss. Raine coming, but she wasn't with Grace.

- Good Morning class. Hope you have all warmed up because today we have lots of things to work on. Prix de Fonteyn Nationals is coming, and if you want to represent Australia in the international round you'll have to work harder than you ever imagined possible.

The girls started to head to their spots so we could start the class; I walked over to Miss. Raine who was preparing the music.

- Good morning Miss. Raine.

- Good morning Tara. – She said still focusing on the stereo.

- May I ask you where Grace is?

- Yes you may – She turned to face me with worried eyes – she took a plane today, but she will probably be here by Monday. Her Dad has some plans in London, marriage arrangements. She will spend this weekend there.

- But Grace accepted to go? She hates the marriage idea!

- Her Dad didn't really make this a choice. She had to. It was hard for her, but she will have to accept that her Dad will be marriage again soon. – Miss. Raine took a deep breath and then her usual serious look returned to her eyes – Now I think you should start working; you have made it through Regional Round, but the Nationals will be ten times harder. And it is just around the corner.

- Okay, Miss. Raine. Thanks.

I walked back to where Kat and Abigail were. They seemed worried.

- Is everything ok T?

- Yes Kat. I was just asking her were Grace was.

- Oh… Grace – Both of them said in unisonant.

The classroom was tiring, but we didn't work on anything new or special. This afternoon on the other hand I knew would be harder. The students that had made it to Nationals would have to work on their solos with Miss. Raine and Patrick. Grace wasn't here today so it would be me, Abigail, Sammy, Ben… and Christian.

The rest of the classes on that morning were pretty ordinary, it was like all the teachers wanted us to focus on technique and strength. I know these are important, but how about artistry, performance. We could work on bars and simple exercises our whole lives but when it gets to the make it or break it time the performance counts, you have to show people what's in your heart, because if you don't it feels like just steps.

Me and the girls decided to have lunch together. Abigail for my surprise took real food, like proteins and carbohydrates (all counted and controlled for sure) instead of only a salad.

- So Kat, what will you do this afternoon? – I asked her.

- I don't know, I think I will just take a walk by these lonely streets of life, as you and Abigail won't come with me. – She was doing a funny dramatic face, pretending to cry.

- You know we can't Kat. Me and Tara have class this afternoon.

- Abigail is right. These classes are important. Plus you shouldn't be complaining Kat. Remember how close you were of not studying at the academy at all after last year? And now you even got the chance to come back _and_ in the second year with us. Be grateful.

- I know, I was not enjoying being a first year for the second year – She laughed - I don't think I would have made it through the Regional round anyway.

- You don't know that Kat. You could have made it, just as me and Abigail, especially this year that you are all effortful and working hard.

- Yeah, I think I'm spending way too much time with Abigail.

We all laughed. The subject changed a thousand times during the lunch. It was probably 1:30 p.m. when me and Abigail decided we should go to the Academy, to change our clothes, warm up and start rehearsing our solos before the class would start.

We said our goodbyes and in a few minutes we got to the changing room. We were not the only ones there but the other girls were all first years so they stayed quite when we entered the room. That is the thing about being with Abigail. _All _the first years will respect you because they adore her. She is their example, some sort of Ballet Goddesses or something, and if you ask me, I would say she kind of likes it.

When we got to the studio there was nobody there, so we started to warm up, Abigail put some music on and in a few minutes we started dancing just to relax before the hard work. We were laughing and having a great time until I saw Christian coming through the door which made me feel a sudden sadness.

I turned to look back at Abigail and she seemed worried with me. She came closer and gave me a hug. When she let go of me she looked deep in my eyes.

- Look Tara, I might not be the specialist when it comes to relationships. But do you remember when you said this morning about how complicated you and Christian are?

- Yes – I said almost in a whisper.

- Well. I was thinking, this is just my opinion but… No matter what happens you guys always come back to each other. You make him a better person, and he makes you better too. – She stopped for a moment looking down, and for a second I thought she forgot she was talking to me - I think the point is that it doesn't matter how hard things are you always come back together. That is what I call love, I mean, being able to overcome all the expectations, and turn around the worst situations.

- But it is just so…

- Complicated. I know that is what you think, but… It is like we do in ballet. – She waited trying to figure if I understood her point, then took a deep breath and continued - We work hard to get what we really want, and we go through doubts and pain but in the end we realize that to get what we truly love is always hard, because nothing worth it comes so easily.

Her words touched deep in my heart, and my mind started to play my moments with Christian since we have meet. I looked at him on the other side of the studio, and he looked at me back. For a moment everything around us disappeared and we just stood there lost in each other's eyes.


	22. Chapter 22

22-Christian

Her look was different. The Tara looking at me now wasn't the same one I had seen in the last two weeks. That was my Tara, the dreaming girl, with the innocent look on her face, with my favorite shy smile. I couldn't break that moment, even if I wanted to. I couldn't get enough of her look, it felt like years since the last time I saw Tara looking at me like that.

- Hey guys – I heard a voice but it felt distant, probably because I was still coming back to real life.

Tara finally turned to look at the person, and although I didn't want to, I did the same. It was Sammy; he entered the room and walked straight to Abigail. Nobody said anything, and there was clearly something heavy in the air. Tara looked back and forth between them, while Sammy ignored everyone else, his eyes focused only on Abigail.

- Can I talk to you Abi? – Sammy said, now in front of her.

- Shouldn't you be with Ollie or something? – Abigail turned around, and although she tried to sound cold and angry, her voice seemed vulnerable.

- Please. – He said almost in a whisper.

Abigail looked at him again, I was in the other side of the room but I could still tell she was about to cry. She just nodded with her head, and they walked out of the studio. I looked back at Tara and she was still looking confused and a little worried. She kept staring at them until they were gone, and then she turned at me.

- Do you have any idea of what is going on? – I asked walking closer to her.

- Kind of… I think… - It looked like a billion different things were going through her mind – Abigail told me some things… And… I don't know, I might just be guessing but... I thought they were over. Gosh is this what she was talking about?

- This what? – Now I was also confused.

- Abigail was giving me some, advice – She seemed uncomfortable with this last word – And now I'm starting to figure we were probably not talking about me.

- What kind of advice?

- About… You – She said looking down.

- You were talking about me? – She nodded – What kind of things?

- I don't wanna talk about this right now.

- Well we have to Tara. I'm not losing any more time; I'm tired of being apart from you.

- Then maybe you should think better in the things you say, before they come out, they are the reason why you are pushing people away.

- Look… I was just trying to be honest with you that night. I know you didn't believe me when I said he had planned that, and lied to you about Sammy, but I was telling the true.

- Even if it was true, how could you ask me to leave him? Stay away from the guy who helped me and supported me all this time?

- I don't want him around of you Tara, because _I know_ he will try to take you from me, and I can't stand that.

- I don't want to stay away from you either, no matter how hard it is to understand you sometimes; it is harder to stay away from you, to ignore you. I will talk to him, if that is what you want. I'll try to make this as clear as possible, but I won't, are you listening me? I _won't _stay away from Ben. So don't ask me to do that again.

Those words were breaking every hope I had to convince her into not talking to Ben anymore. I felt heavy remembering the talk we had that morning, remembering the look on his eyes, not treating, not ironic as usually, he seemed to be listening but I was not counting on his help to my relationship with Tara. I realized the way she was looking at me, with worried eyes, almost apologizing for hurting me. I felt her fingers in my face as she came closer to me and started to whisper against my ear.

- If it helps… I missed you too. – She looked in my eyes smiling shyly.

That was all I needed. I felt her hand on my neck and kissed her. While we were kissing I could feel she was smiling which made me smile too. I wrapped my hands on her back pushing her closer. Everything was perfect until…

- Disgusting…

I let go of the kiss and both, me and Tara, looked at the person who was in the doorstep.

- I don't know what is worst. Sammy and Abigail in the hallway, or you guys here. – Ben said making disgusted faces like a kid – If I were you I would stop it now, because I just saw Patrick and Miss. Raine coming downstairs.

He finally walked in the studio throwing his bag in the corner and heading straight to the bars.

I looked at Tara and realized I was still holding on to her waist, and now she was doing the same with me. I think she realized I was a little worried with Ben's arrival, and she pecked my lips which gave me a little more confidence.

- I will talk to him – she said holding tighter to my waist and laying her head in my chest – I promise.

I kissed the top of her head and heard Miss. Raine and Patrick entering the room, followed by Sammy and Abigail who were now holding hands.


	23. Chapter 23

23-Tara

- I really hope it was worth it. I'm very disappointed with both of you, but especially with you Abigail. You've lost your focus completely; I'm asking myself how important ballet is to you. – Miss. Raine said as she marched into the studio.

- I'm really sorry Miss. Raine it wasn't her fault… - Sammy tried to interrupt.

- Samuel I won't discuss this with you, but hear it when I say there are better ways of using your time, then making out with your classmate.

Both of their faces, Abigail's and Sammy's, turned as red as a tomato, I was afraid they could explode. They both looked down and walked to where me and Christian were. By now I had already let go of him, none of us was looking for problems with Miss. Raine. I was trying to seem less shocked then I really was about Abigail and Sammy thing, but I couldn't control the smile in my face.

- So… Making out? – Christian said looking to Sammy, Abigail just looked down.

- Yeah. – Sammy was still blushing.

Ben walked closer to us, he was smiling too. He came behind Abigail and Sammy and put his hand on their shoulders.

- As I said… Disgusting. You should have seen this two back in the hallway. – Abigail smiled shyly and held Sammy's hand – Well, anyway. I think we should get this started, I don't know about you, but I'm done with Miss. Raine's lessons for today.

We all nodded and took our spots in the studio. It was a whole afternoon class and I can't remember the last time I had worked that hard. It was always like no matter how hard we tried it was never good enough, it wasn't perfect. But will it ever be?

When it was about 6 p.m. the class was over. Abigail and I went straight to the changing room; I was dying to take a bath. We walked in there and the room was empty, ok it was almost Friday night, why would anyone be there? That place was perfect, I had to ask her something in private and there would be no better time than now. I walked in the shower next to hers.

- So Abi…

- Yes?

- I was wondering, what was that whole thing this afternoon?

- What you mean?

- I mean, those advices you were giving me.

- Oh… What about them?

- Were they really meant for _me_?

For a moment the only sound in the room was the water falling from the showers and then I finally heard I shy laughter.

- I knew it! – I yelled – How long is this thing going on between you and Sammy?

- It wasn't until today. I mean, he talked to me about Ollie, but… - She didn't finish which made me even more curious.

- What about Ollie? What happened?

- They had an argument. Sammy was with him when Ollie got the news he had almost no chance of getting the contract with the Company. Sammy told me about it. It seems like things got ugly.

- When did that happen?

- About a week ago.

- So Ollie is out of the Company? – I asked surprised.

- No, but Miss. Raine told him he was far behind the others, according to Sammy she said Ollie was one of the best dancers but his behavior was putting him down.

- I would say I feel sorry for Sammy about the break up, but… I don't know, I wasn't really happy with Ollie lately, Sammy looked like a zombie since they started his "training", I couldn't even recognize him in the last few weeks. That relationship wasn't making him happy.

- I agree, that is what I told him. The day he was telling me about his argument with Ollie I told him I think they should take a time apart. He didn't like that much. He freaked out and yelled saying I wasn't helping and everything… - I could hear her voice getting sadder.

- So what did he want to talk about today? Did he apologize?

- Yes, he did. He said he was sorry about the way he treated me and I said it was okay.

Another moment of silence… There was still a question I wanted to make, I just didn't know if it would be too much of an intrusion. I knew I wanted to know and nothing in this world could keep me from asking; besides we were getting closer now, she could trust me and I could trust her.

- Abi… I want to ask you something. It is a little embarrassing to ask that, but you don't have to answer if you don't want to.

- Okay.

- How did it happen? I mean, sorry but, I don't understand. Sammy and Ollie broke up? And he decided he loves you, I mean it is great, I'm so happy for you, I really am. But I thought he was…

- Gay? Yeah, me too. – She said laughing – He broke up with Ollie, because after what I told him they had another fight and he said it was enough. Then today after he apologized it just happened. We were talking about him and how he was feeling about the break up, and he said he was good, but it felt like something was missing. I got were he wanted to go with it, and then…

- Okay got it. – I said laughing loud – No need for more details. I'm glad you decided to follow your own advice.

- Me too.

We finished changing and walked out of the Academy. Christian and Sammy were waiting for us. I couldn't help but smile when I saw Christian walking towards me with his arms open. I walked over to him and gave him a hug.

- I need to talk to you. Can we take a walk? – He whispered in my ear.

- Sure – I said now looking at him.

He held my hand and we started to walk towards the beach.


	24. Chapter 24

24-Christian

- What did you want to talk when you asked me to take a walk with you? – Tara asked breaking the silence.

- About us.

- Okay, what about us?

- Don't be so anxious, you'll find out when is the right time. – I said smiling at her face.

- Is it a good thing?

- Hopefully.

- Come one Christian, why can't you tell me?

- Because if I tell you it won't be as good as you seeing it.

We kept walking down the beach holding hands, and I tried to change the subject, but Tara kept asking what I wanted to show her. In a few minutes we got to our destination. A few feet away there were some candles in the sand around a cloth and a picnic basket. As we got closer I could see Tara's smile growing bigger, as she turned to look at me.

- A picnic? – She asked cheerfully.

- Yes. Do you like it?

- Of course! – She hugged me tight.

- I'm glad you do. When I got this idea I wasn't sure if we would have already talked _that_ out. Thankfully Kat helped me.

- Kat?

- Yes! I talked to her. I asked her to prepare the picnic this afternoon, while we were at the studio. If everything worked out the picnic would be ready, and if not… Well, at least I had tried, right?

- Now I get it!

- Get what?

- Why Kat was asking me how the things were going with you this morning, so out of nowhere.

- Yeah, I guess she's not much of a subtle person – I said laughing – But she did a great job here, didn't she?

- Yes!

- So – I took a step ahead still holding her hand – Can we eat? I'm starving.

- Me too.

Being there with Tara, close to her again, with the starts over our heads was amazing. We ate the sandwiches and the cake, in a few minutes the food was gone, so I could tell she was just as hungry as I was. We lay on the cloth staying silent for quite a while, and I embraced her, it was a little cold as we were close to the sea. She turned her body to look at me.

- So what was it about? – She asked me.

- What?

- The thing you wanted to talk with me… About us.

- Oh… That.

- Yes, _that_. What is _that_ about?

- My father. – She froze like a statue; I waited until she blinked to realize she was still alive.

- What does it have to do with us? - she was clearly uncomfortable.

- Everything.

She kept looking at me but I could tell by her face she wouldn't say anything else, her look was suspicious, and she seemed to be waiting for me to continue the conversation.

- Since you found out about my Dad a lot of things happened.

- You broke up with me. – Her voice was now a whisper.

- Yes – My voice was getting lower too – Then there was Kat, and Saskia broke your back, and you got expelled…

- What is your point?

- My point is. It all started with my Dad, and my problems with him. I want this, _us_, to work. I want to solve this thing. So I figured I should start apologizing and explaining why I acted the way I did. - She nodded yes and pressed her head against my arm.

I told her everything. The reason I didn't want to meet with my dad again, the story of how he left my mom. I told her how I felt when she searched for him behind my back to make me see him again, like she was trying to fix my problems, my damages, even knowing it was her try to help me. I admitted I had overreacted, so I apologized for that too. After I told her everything she kept silent for a moment, looking at the sky, still processing all I had said.

- Thanks for telling me. – She was now finally smiling.

- You deserved to know. And it is a beginning to start winning your trust back. I'm sorry for breaking up with you, and I'm sorry for everything that happened after that.

- Even this? – She pecked my lips.

- No – I said smiling as she did it.

- You know what was the worst part? – I looked at her and shook my head as a no – Seeing you with Kat was hard, but when I discovered you had talked to your father and presented her as your girlfriend… It was the moment when I really felt betrayed. Not only that, I felt used, because you were with my best friend and now you were talking with your dad, which was the reason why you had broke up with me at first. - Her words felt like a knife on my chest.

- Sorry – I whispered, realizing what she said was true – I'm really sorry.

- It's okay. But… now that we are being honest here, how are the things with your Dad going?

- Better than before, we talk and hang out sometimes; it is not like we are close though… but can we not talk about this right now? – I said sitting in the cloth while she stayed laid looking at me.

- Sure. What do you want to do?

I smiled at Tara and started to bend down at her. In a second I was over her body, but still supporting mine with my arms.

- I don't know… - I said putting on an ironical smile – What do _you_ want to do?

I knew she got it as soon as I felt her hand behind my neck as she started to kiss me. We laid there under the stars kissing like that moment was all we got. The only lights were the candles and the moon and the only sounds I could hear were the sea and Tara's breathe against my face.


	25. Chapter 25

25-Tara

That night at the beach with Christian is the last thing I remember until the day of the National Round of The Prix de Fonteyn. The two weeks before the big day flew and we had so many things to do I couldn't even remember I had a life besides ballet sometimes. Those weeks seemed empty though, I was really anxious and excited for the competition, but also scared as hell. The days were passing in front of my eyes; all of them seemed the same. There was not a moment I could say was surprising, unpredictably amazing… The schedule was controlled and Miss. Raine was making sure that me and all the others who would compete were using their time "correctly"... This pretty much means, no romance time. However, it seemed like the more I practiced the more nervous I'd get.

I woke up on the dawn after another one of the multiple nightmares I had been having. Not a chance I would try to sleep again, the last thing I could do was sleep. I looked at the watch… 2 a.m. Do you know that moment when the penny drops and you realize the time has come? The day had finally arrived.

I made my way downstairs ready to spend the next hours alone in a dark living room, when I realized there was someone there, laid on the couch, with his thoughtful eyes wide open.

- Ben. Are you ok?

He didn't look surprised to see me there, not at all. He just smiled and sat on the couch, to make some room for me to join him.

- Yes – He laughed – Why? Is there something wrong with _you_?

- No – I laughed too, walking towards the couch – I was just checking. So… What are you doing here?

- Couldn't sleep.

- Me neither.

- I know.

- Of course you do, I'm here right? – I said still laughing.

- Actually, I knew it before, knowing you I was sure you wouldn't be able to sleep. I knew that at any moment you would come downstairs.

- What if I didn't?

- Then I would just keep laid here until the morning.

- Alone? In the dark?

- Wouldn't you do the same if I wasn't here?

- You're right, I would.

For a few minutes we kept silent, I couldn't see him well, everything was dark, but I could tell he was staring at me. I looked down to avoid his look, and then he broke the silence.

- I don't know why people are always so afraid of the dark and the loneliness. Sometimes, they are everything we need. Before you appeared, I was laid here thinking about my life, my friends, my family… The Prix. Sometimes what we really need is to be on our own, to put our minds on their places.

- Have you put yours?

- Sort of.

- I get what you said, if I was here alone, I'd probably be thinking about everything you did. When I'm alone it is like my mind opens and all my hidden thoughts, plans and wishes, they just come out. So, I think I agree with you… in terms.

- In terms?

- Yeah… 'Cause I also understand why people are so afraid of the dark.

- That would be…

- Because people are afraid of what they don't know. When you are in the dark you can't see things clear, you don't know what is happening around you, you don't know who or what can be hidden in a shadow, waiting for the right moment to come out.

- You can't be really talking about monsters! – He said laughing.

- No! Well, maybe. We all have our intern monsters, the ones we tried to ignore and hide. I'm not talking about werewolves, vampires or the boogeyman; I'm talking about the real ones: the fears, the doubts, the pain.

- Are they seeking for you right now? – He asked serious with his voice low.

- No, I mean, I was just making a point… - I avoided his interrogative eyes.

- Tara… You can tell me.

- Okay – I breathed deep – I've been having these nightmares, about the Prix de Fonteyn. I can't stop thinking about everything that can go wrong. The multiple ways I can screw this.

- Why? You are a great dancer. You have to believe in yourself.

- I'm trying but… - I felt the tears fulfilling my eyes - I have worked so hard for this, and waited for so long to this chance, I'm afraid of wasting it and disappointing everyone.

- You won't. All you have to do is your best.

- But what if it's not enough? – I couldn't control the tears anymore.

- Then there is nothing you can do about it. But for now, trust yourself; trust there it _will _be enough.

- I don't now if I can trust myself.

- Well… Then trust me, trust me because I trust you! I know how capable you are and I know you will kill it on your performance, okay? – He said holding my face in between his hands.

I nodded and he hugged me.

- You have been distant these days. I miss you and we barely talk. – I told him, trying to change the subject, but still sobbing.

- Yeah, well… I have been doing a lot of stuff. Rehearsing, studying and working out a lot.

- Lots of problems to think about? – I whipped my tears away.

- What? – He asked surprised.

- Once you told me you work out when you have to think about something. So, what have been bugging you?

- It is not like bugging me. It is just… some stuff I had to think better.

- Do you want to tell me?

- I think you already know. I'm sure you noticed.

- You'd be surprised. These last weeks I had _no_ social life; I have no idea of what is going on with anybody, so don't expect me to know about anything.

- What I have been thinking about isn't something that happened in the last two weeks Tara, it was way before.

I looked at his face trying to concentrate and figure out what exactly he was talking about. I realized it had been almost a month since the last time I had a long cool conversation with Ben, after what happened at the surprise night we talked but it was nothing personal like this conversation. And then there was Christian… Wait!

- Is this about me and Christian? – After I said it I realized that maybe we shouldn't talk about it, but the words came out as soon as I thought about them, I couldn't control my mouth.

- Yes, also. – He looked down – But this is more about you and me.

- Okay. – Only word I could manage to say.

- Christian told me some things. Things that changed the way I was thinking a little. Look Tara, you know how I feel about you, right?

- Yes…

- I thought I knew how Christian felt about you too. But, I think I was wrong. He told me he loves you, and he seemed pretty… honest, about it. A guy is not always that honest. But more than anything, he said that if I wanted to see you happy, I should stay out of your way and let you choose who really is better for you.

- Is this another ultimatum? – I asked serious.

- No…

- Good, because I won't choose between you and him, both of you are too special to me.

- Thanks, but what I was really thinking is… Was I pushing you? Ignoring what you were feeling to believe you felt the same way I did?

I couldn't answer him, I didn't want to hurt his feelings, but he did push me to choose between him and Christian.

- That's okay, I know I did. I'm sorry… not for what I fell, but for making things hard for you. That is what I had to think about. I realized I was being selfish to force you to fell a certain way, swearing it was about you when it was clearly about me.

- Why are you telling me all this?

- Because I needed to let you know that from now on, I won't push you to anything. Whatever happens I want to be close to you, even if we are just friends. I can't stand to be apart from you anymore. I didn't notice it happening, but you became a big part of my life.

I couldn't control the smile in my face. I hugged Ben tight, hearing his shy laughter.

- Thank you Ben.

- For what?

- For everything, for this, for being my friend… For being _you_!

We let go of the hug but I couldn't stop smiling. We kept talking until the morning and it was everything I needed, to have Ben close again, without the awkwardness and the embarrassments, the old Ben, my friend… Ben.


	26. Chapter 26

26-Christian

As I opened my eyes I knew there was something different, something special in a scary way about this morning. The Prix de Fonteyn had finally arrived, and I was competing in the National Round; that is a big a responsibility and I'm terrible with those. The next two days would decide if I would or not go on to the International Round, to represent the entire country on a worldwide competition. That is a _hell_ of a responsibility, but for some reason I was incredibly anxious and excited.

I looked around on my room and Sammy was still sleeping. I got up and walked over to the closet, picked some clothes and walked out of the room, ready to have breakfast.

As I got to the living room I saw Tara and Ben in the couch. _Control yourself Christian, they haven't talked for a month_, a voice kept saying in my head, maybe I could fool myself to believe I wasn't worried at all. _Act normally, _the voice spoke again.

- Good morning. – I said faking a smile.

- Good morning bro. – Ben said smiling.

- Good morning! – Tara said getting up from the couch and opened her arms to hug me.

I pecked her lips and looked over to Ben; he was still trying to smile.

- So, how long have you guys been here? – I faked indifference.

- About four hours. – Ben answered.

- What? – I realized too late how desperate my voice sounded.

- None of us could sleep; Ben was already here when I got downstairs.

- Oh, sure. – _Act normally_, the voice repeated – So, who is ready for some breakfast?

- Me! – Tara said excited – I'm just gonna go upstairs and change. – She headed to her room.

- How about you Ben?

- Ok, why not right?

We walked to the kitchen and Ben started to pick some things, inside of me the questions were exploding and I couldn't control myself.

- What are you up to this time Benster?

- What? – He said still focused on the fridge.

- What are you trying to do this time?

- I'm not trying to do anything. – He turned to face me.

- Then why would you and Tara spend four hours talking in the dawn?

- As we told you, none of us could sleep.

- I know Tara can't sleep when she is anxious, but you? You planned this didn't you Ben?

- Well no. Sure I knew Tara wouldn't be able to sleep, but I didn't _plan_ not to sleep either. – He said ironically.

- Why can't I believe this? – I looked at him serious.

- I don't know. We just talked; there is nothing for you to worry about. I thought that was what you wanted.

- What?

- You asked me to back off while you were with Tara. And I did so, but you keep not believing it.

- Don't you think I have enough good reasons to doubt your unexpected contribution?

- Well I guess you'll just have to start trusting me. – He said smiling.

I was about to answer him when I heard steps.

- So you guys have already settled the table up? – Tara said as she joined us at the kitchen.

- Yes. Not that I'm _really_ going to eat anything, my stomach is not the strongest on competition day. – Ben said taking a sit on the table, and so did I.

- That is not a _big_ problem Ben. – Tara replied.

- Yeah, but it kind of bugs me… Anything I eat feels terrible in my stomach. – Ben continued.

- Well, I have other kinds of problems on competition day. – I said joining the conversation and trying to seem as natural as Ben.

- For example? You always seem ok with ballet stuff like this. – Tara said.

- It is not like your freak outs Tara – I said smiling as I laid my arm around her shoulders – I tend to see things different, like everything means something.

- Like paranoid. – Ben said smiling.

- Kind of… - I continued – It is like I feel everybody expects something so they are always looking at me, and dropping hints about things, but it is probably just me creating that stuff on my head. My brain doesn't take responsibilities well.

- Yeah – Tara kissed my cheek – Definitely paranoid.

- So Tara – Ben sounded uncomfortable – Tell me about your freak outs, are they worst then the usual on competition day?

- Sometimes – She looked at me and I put on an ironical face which made her smile – Ok Christian… Yes, they are pretty worst… I don't know, I just get too nervous. Like right now, that I'm thinking about it, so thanks a lot guys!

- You would freak out anyway T! – Ben said – We are just anticipating it.

Even I had to laugh at Tara's face. We kept talking and finished breakfast. I manage myself to talk to Ben without wanting to kill him, and also controlled my mind not to think that everything he said was a hint for me about him and Tara… Well, at least… I tried.

- Shouldn't the rest of the guys have already woken up? – Ben asked as we removed the stuff in the table, cleaning it.

- I think Abigail is probably awake, getting ready – Tara said – Her Mom has been really annoying about The Prix, she is so into it, the poor Abigail can't do anything about this competition without her mother's approval.

- Well at least now we know where Abigail's tendency to obsession with ballet comes from. – I said, making them laugh.

- But how about Grace? Sammy? – Ben asked again.

- I don't think Grace is that worried about the competition, but she will hopefully show up on time! – Tara said laughing.

- And about Sammy… – I continued – I think he will be here at any moment, he went early to bed yesterday, and it'll probably not take that long for him to wake up.

- Yeah, I think that is it! – Ben said – Competition day. This weekend will be one of the hardest in our lives.

- Hopefully, one of the best too, right Ben? – I said.

- Yeah, but whatever happens, we have made it this far and that is already a big thing isn't it?

- Of course – Tara said smiling – but now, you two, stop the girl talk!

- What? – I asked surprised – Girl talk?

- Yeah, this entire sentimental thing. I don't want to cry right now guys – she embraced my waist – Plus, this is not the time to think about those things. We have made it this far, okay that is great and we should be proud of ourselves, but right now let's focus on what is ahead of us, do our best to win this thing! – She finished with a confident smile.

- I don't remember the last time I've seen you like this. But I really your self-confidence – I said looking at her eyes – Where did all that came from?

- Well – she glanced over to Ben – Someone told me to believe myself, to do my best and trust that it will be enough. - She looked over to me again.

- As far as I'm concerned – I looked over to Ben, getting what she meant – That person was totally right.

- Well, guys – Ben said changing subject – I don't know about you, but I'm going for a run, Tara is right, time to focus on the prize, so see you guys later.

Ben walked out of the kitchen, leaving me and Tara alone. I looked back at her and she was staring at me with her beautiful shinning eyes.

- What? – I asked, blushing because of her look.

- Nothing, I was just thinking.

- About…

- You, me… and Ben. – I tried to seem comfortable with it – You know, it is so good to talk to both of you like this. And I have to thank you for that.

- Thank me? – Well, I didn't see _that_ one coming.

- Yes, you. For understanding what I have with Ben, our friendship. I know it was hard, but you are trying, to know that makes me so happy and so proud of you! – She put her head on my chest as she hugged me.

- I'm trying because I want to see you happy; I'm doing this for you. – I whispered.

- I know – She whispered and pecked my lips.

He kept our bodies close together, and then I realized how much I had missed Tara, maybe right now was a good moment for us to do something after these two weeks of nothing. If Ben could spend hours talking to her, I could do it too, especially because Tara was _my_ girlfriend, and right now all I needed was to have her with me.


	27. Chapter 27

27-Tara

- So what are you going to do until competition time? – Christian asked me with a charming smile.

- I don't know… Concentrate, rehearse, warm up, this kind of stuff. Why?

- Well, I was just thinking you know, we haven't been spending much time together these days – He pushed me closer to him with his hands on my back – I've been missing you.

- I've missed you too, but you know right now we can't lose focus. This is _really_ important Christian.

- _We_ are important too, don't you think? – He let go of my waist, crossing his arms.

- Of course we are, but we'll have time to be together after The Prix. _This_ can't wait!

- You have to stop doing that. – He seemed serious on his tone, but his face had turned a little sad.

- What? – I asked confused.

- Putting everything and anything ahead of us. We barely talked for two weeks, I'm trying to spend more time with you but you keep finding excuses. – His voice seemed hurt.

- I'm not finding excuses, I'm sorry if that is how I made you feel. But this is not about putting things ahead of us, it is about priorities. – I used the calmest voice I could fake.

- Priorities? What are _yours _Tara? Because _us_ is clearly not one of them! – Now he seemed angry… How great hum?

- That is not what I meant, and you know it! What I'm trying to say is that we need to focus completely on the competition right now; it is not just about us, it is about our teachers, our friends, the Academy…

- It is never just about us Tara. _Never_. – He interrupted me and turned away heading to his room but I held his hand.

- Why are you doing this now? This is not like you.

- Not like me? How am I supposed to be then? – He kept some distance.

- Only you, Christian. You only have to be yourself.

- Well, guess what? This is me Tara. This is me trying to be a good boyfriend, or whatever you want to call me, as you still can't take this as a relationship – He now walked towards me again and in a second we were face to face - This, Tara, is me trying to spend some time with you, because I miss you, but you don't want to be with me. So what do I have to do? Wait in the living room for you in the dawn, maybe then you will talk to me? – He was breathing heavily after he said that, the words had come out so fast it took some time for me to assimilate.

- Don't do this. – I said shocked.

- Do what Tara? – Christian's voice was now louder.

- Don't put Ben into this again – My voice was slowly becoming a whisper – Why now? Two minutes ago I was thanking you for being so supportive and comprehensive.

- Everything I wanted – He said trying to calm down – was to spend some time with you, after all these days, and you said no. So now it is my turn to ask. Why are _you_ doing this Tara?

- You didn't answer my question.

- And it seems like you won't answer mine either.

- I just don't get why suddenly you are so pissed off about my talk with Ben. We just talked.

- During four freaking hours! And you can't spend one with me? You know what? Leave it. I'm going to "concentrate" too; I have better things to do then argument with you about Ben. The Prix is all that matters right now, isn't it Tara? – He looked at me serious.

I couldn't answer so he just turned away and walked towards his room. I heard the door closing and I still didn't know what to do. Where did all that come from? One minute I'm incredibly happy having breakfast with Christian and Ben and everything is perfect. Two minutes later everything is torn?

I sat on the couch and multiple thoughts kept coming through my mind, about Christian, Ben, the competition… I could see people walking around the living room, I could hear the voices but they seemed distant and none of the words would make any sense to me. It was like I was hypnotized or something, until I felt a hand on my shoulder.

- T? T? Are you alive?

- Oh my God – I said startled and finally looked at the person – Hi Sammy. I didn't see you there.

- I noticed. – He said smiling – What were you doing, practicing some new technique of relaxation? Was it yoga? Or were you just sleeping?

- None, I was just… Thinking.

- That is what people say when they want to avoid a conversation. – He sat closer to me and looked deep in my eyes – Come one T, you can tell me, we are friends… You are like my little sister.

- Really Sammy, there is nothing going on, I was just thinking about some stuff, I need to put my mind on the right place until the competition.

- So it's competition stuff… Is The Prix driving you crazy too? – He said laughing, probably just trying to cheer me up.

- Kind of… Yeah, you could say that. It has to do with The Prix. Talking about that, when do we have to be in the Opera House?

- In about an hour.

- What? Already? But I still had two hours left. How long have I been sitting here? – I asked surprised.

- I don't know, I just got here half an hour ago to have breakfast, and you didn't move. I thought you were watching TV. But the girl sitting in the couch with you turned the TV off and you didn't do anything, I asked Christian but he ignored me – His voice got a little lower when he said the last part - so I came to talk to you.

- Oh, right. Well, I think I need to go get my stuff ready, I'll meet you in the Opera House Sammy okay? I got lost on time and now I'm kind of late.

- But we were talking about…

- I know Sammy – I interrupted him – We'll talk later okay? I have to go now. See you.

I ran upstairs and Grace had already left. I quickly picked a bag and started to put my things in it. Point shoes, clothes and everything else that I could think about, I was trying to focus on anything but the fact that I had spent about two hours sitting in a couch like a zombie. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that I didn't sleep well that night, but for some reason I wasn't succeeding to make myself believe that.

I left the Academy and took a cab to the Opera House, alone. The driver turned the radio on and I recognized the melody, it was the same song Ben and I danced that afternoon in the Opera House. The same place I was heading to right now. Did that mean something? If it did, was it a good or a bad sign? Great, I was just getting paranoid like Christian.

A wave o sadness ran through my body as I thought about him. Those two hours I spent alone in the couch doing absolutely nothing could have been two amazing hours with my boyfriend. Yes, _my boyfriend_. That's what Christian was and I had to stop denying it, or pretending we were just having something casual, that is not how I roll, I don't know how to be with Christian, without falling for him completely.

Maybe I was pushing him. Expecting him to be okay with me and Ben but not giving him enough time to get used to it, in the end of the day he had his reasons to doubt Ben's intensions and he could be pretty jealous when he wanted to. Christian had to understand at some point that everything I wanted from Ben was his friendship, but until then I had to make him confident enough about what I felt for him and I was failing on that.

- We are here. – The old driver man said waking me up from my thoughts as he looked at me in the back sit extending his hand to take the money.

I paid him and left the cab, turned my body and there is was. The Opera House. As I climbed the stairs I could feel all my emotions mixing. The sadness that had won my body in the cab was slowly being replaced by happiness, anxiety, fear, pride… Everything I had felt in the last months. It was like I could feel the moments that had took me to that place and moment coming back to light. But why was I feeling so incomplete?

It took a while to find someone from the Academy there, I looked for Kat but she was probably on the backstage and before I headed there I had to get ready. I walked over to the dressing room; I didn't have much time. As I got there I found Abigail finishing her make-up.

- Hey Tara – She said looking at me through the mirror – I was afraid you wouldn't come.

- I wouldn't miss this. – I said sitting on the empty chair beside her.

- I'll let you get ready, I have to find Sammy and I'm still not warmed up. – She stood up and looked at me smiling – So, do I look good?

- You look amazing Abi. – I faked a smile.

- Hey, don't take too long to get ready, you have to warm up too, and Miss. Raine wants to talk to all of us before the competition. I'll tell her you are here; she was having a freak out cause she couldn't find you anywhere. You should've seen her face.- She laughed but quickly stopped when she realized I couldn't do the same, and trust me I tried.- Is everything okay Tara?

- Hum… Yeah, sure. – I tried to seem convincing – I'm just a little worried about the competition, anxious you know… But I'll get over it.

- Okay, hurry up then, see you later. – She said walking out of the room.

I got my outfit for the classical round out of my bag and luckily it wasn't so wrinkled. I did my make-up as simple and as fast as I could and jumped into the white garment. I did my hair quickly, after two years at the Academy you learn how to make fast a nice ballet hairstyle. I was almost done when I heard someone knocking the door.

- Come in. – As I looked who it was through the mirror I couldn't help but smile.


	28. Chapter 28

28-Christian

- I knew sooner or later I would find you. – Sammy said – Can I join you? – He said pointing at the stair where I was sitting.

- Be my guest. – I looked down.

- So… I talked to Tara. She didn't tell me what is going on. – I kept avoiding his look – And it seems like you won't tell me either, will you?

- There is nothing to tell.

- That is not what your puppy face tells me. Come on dude, what is wrong? Wait, let me guess… It has to do with Ben. – I looked at him and he got it – So I was right, what do you _think_ he did this time?

- Why are you being so ironical?

- Because you are apparently the only person in the whole world that has seen the "evil" side of Ben. – He said laughing.

- I never said he was evil.

- Well, you didn't have to. Just by the way you describe him, I mean, come on you talk about Ben like he is a criminal or something.

- Sorry if I'm not the biggest fan of the guy who is in love with my… girlfriend – That last word came out painfully.

- Get over it dude, Tara is with you right? Do you expect her to tell you she loves you each minute you guys are together? Or do you expect her to ignore Ben? It is not going to happen and you know that, it doesn't mean she doesn't love you. Now will you tell me what happened? Come on.

- Okay... Today I woke up and when I got to the living room, Tara and Ben where there. They told me they had been talking through the night because none of them could sleep. The whole freaking night! – I looked at Sammy and he was trying not to laugh – What now?

- Is that what this is all about? A talk?

- Will you let me finish?

- Sorry, go on. – He was still trying to hold his laughter.

- We had breakfast together, the three of us.

- And you are all alive, see, that is what _I_ call progress! – He gave me a punch in the shoulder, but I was not in the mood for jokes.

- Sammy…

- Okay, got it.

- So after that, Tara and I were talking and I was telling her how much I missed being with her. I wanted us to spend some time together.

- Okay, what is wrong about that?

- Nothing! That is _exactly_ what I thought!

- Then why the drama?

- Because she didn't want to be with me before the competition, she said she couldn't lose "focus".

- That's understandable.

- Will you support me here? _Friend_?

- Sorry, I just don't get why you got so pissed off, maybe she was just worried, or she had something important to do, I don't know. We all worked really hard to get here, she just want to do this right.

- So that's a no, you won't support me.

- I just don't see the point, why are you guys so sad?

- We had an argument. Tara can't spent one hour with me, after I tell her how much I've missed being with her, but she could spend the whole night talking to Ben? Wouldn't that piss you off?

- That is why you are worried? Christian, if what they told you is true, and I doubt they'd lie about something as ordinary as a talk, there is nothing for you to worry about. Ben and Tara talked, big deal, they are friends. Hey, we are talking right now, does that means you are in love with me?

- But what did they talk about all that time, all alone? And after that Ben tells me that he is backing off and wants me to believe him? I mean… Come on, I'm not stupid.

- Wait, backing off on what? Tara?

- I talked to him about her a time ago, and this morning he told me he wouldn't try anything as long as I was with her. But I didn't buy it.

- Why? For God sake why? – Sammy yelled - He is doing _exactly_ what you asked him to!

- I just can't believe he would change _that_ fast.

- He didn't change Christian, Ben was never that guy you thought he was! It was just your way of seeing him. You are the one making this harder, take a chance with him, try to be his friend, whatever, I don't know, but if you keep doing these conspiracy theories about Ben, he won't have to do anything to separate you from Tara, you'll do it yourself. God, you are getting so paranoid! – Now Sammy was the one looking pissed off.

- I know. – Of course I was being paranoid.

- So you agree with me? – He asked surprised.

- Not really, but I kind of see your point. I know that I'm the only one who thinks Ben is more than just the goofy guy, but trust me he did try to break me and Tara apart.

- That doesn't make him a bad person Christian. Remember when Tara was with Ethan? You wanted to be with her, even knowing she was taken. You can't blame the guy for trying. In the end she still wanted to be with you, so stop complicating things that are really simple.

- It is _not_ simple Sammy.

- Do you love her? – He asked serious.

- Of course. – I said fast and surely.

- Then I guess it is not that complicated either. – He stood up – Enough of this stuff. Come on, it is almost competition time, and Miss. Raine wants to talk to us. Are you ready to go?

- I think so. – I left the stair and followed Sammy into the theater.

As we got to the backstage we found Abigail warming up. Sammy opened a big smile and walked over to her.

- Hey there. – He said hugging Abigail.

- Hey! I've been looking for you, I wanted to see you before my performance, and wish you good luck in yours. – She pecked his lips and then finally realized I was there too. – Hi Christian.

- Hello. – I answered with no excitement – Hey guys I think I'll just leave you alone, I have to warm up and… Find Tara.

- You are gonna talk to her? – Sammy asked surprised – This will be like the first time you are taking my advice without trying your own way first.

- I did try my own way and I screwed it up, remember? So let's try your approach.

- Christian – Abigail said coming closer to me – I have just left the dressing room and Tara had just arrived. I think she is still in there, if you want to find her maybe you should check.

- Okay, thanks Abigail. See you guys later.

I walked over to the hallway of the girls dressing rooms. It was crowded and, God, girls can talk really loud when they want to, a bunch of them together and I almost got deaf. It was hard to make my way through them as they were all going to the backstage, the exact place I was trying to leave.

When I got to one of the last doors in the hallway, it was already far from the real crowd of dancers who were in a hurry heading to the backstage. As I got closer to that door the hallway got more silent. I started to hear Tara's voice inside the room and there was for sure someone in there with her.

_**Author's Note: Hey guys! Sorry if it's taking longer for me to update, school has been a little crazy but I'll try to be faster. I hope it was worth waiting. Thanks for the reviews and keep reading! :D**_


	29. Chapter 29

29-Tara

- Sorry to disturb you… Wow. You look, _amazing_! - He said kindly as he entered the room.

- Thanks Ben! – I turned in my chair to look at him – So what are you doing here? Shouldn't we all be backstage? I was just about to go there.

- Oh yeah, we have, I was just looking for you, couldn't find you anywhere.

- No one could, I arrived a few minutes ago.

- That explains a lot. – He said smiling and coming closer to me – But if you arrived a few minutes ago, then how did you get all that make-up on, and the hair, and…

- Girls can take really long to get ready – I interrupted him - but we can also be really fast if we want. This time I _needed _to do everything on fast-forward.

- Well, you did a great job, you look stunning. – He kept staring at me and I knew I was blushing.

- Stop looking at me like that! – I avoided his eyes.

- Why? – He said laughing.

- Because it's weird! Come on; let's get out of here, the competition starts in about ten minutes, I'm not warmed up and I still have to talk to Miss. Raine.

- Good luck on that, she must be mad at you.

- Don't you think I know that? I'm hoping she won't kill me, because if she does it will be bad for the Academy's image with the judges. – I said laughing, as always Ben was making me feel better.

- Yeah, but if I were you I wouldn't count on that. You should've seen her; she was getting out of her mind!

- You're not the first one to tell me that. But I'll solve it later. We don't have time now. – He stood still and I pushed him a little – Come on Ben, move, we are already late!

We left the dressing room and I saw someone running down the hallway. I couldn't be sure, and I was actually hoping I was wrong, hoping it was just my confused mind playing tricks on me, but the true is that I knew who that was, and it was Christian. _Don't think about it now _I told myself multiple times as Ben and I made our way through the other dancers to get backstage. It was a crowd and we had to find the other guys. There were different noises around but I couldn't focus on anything, all those voices mixed were making no sense, it was just one loud noise. And then…

- Tara Webster! – And that was a mad woman calling my name louder than all the other voices.

I turned around to find Miss. Raine and the rest of the crew walking over to where me and Ben were standing. She really looked angry, but my mind forced me to ignore Miss. Raine as soon as I saw Christian behind her at Sammy's side. He looked at me with sad eyes but I couldn't tell exactly why. I didn't know if it was because of our argument today, if it had hurt him as much as it did with me, or if it had something to do with him hearing me and Ben in the dressing room, not that we did or said anything that friends wouldn't, but in the end it was Christian so he probably thought Ben was proposing to me.

- Tara, are you listening to me? – Miss. Raine yelled again and now she was right in front of me – Do you know how irresponsible it was of you to disappear in such an important day like this? After all the hard work, everything you did to get here, I can't believe you couldn't arrive on time. There is no excuse for that childish behavior.

- I'm sorry Miss. Raine. – I said with my voice down.

- And you should be! I'm really disappointed with you; do you have any idea of how desperate we were all looking for you? These judges, they have been neglecting the Academy students for some years, I don't want to give them any more reason to do that. Understood? – I nodded.

- Wait Miss. Raine – Sammy entered in the conversation – What do you mean by "neglecting the Academy students"?

Miss. Raine turned her back to me and stared at him; she took a deep breath and tried to calm down. She finally made a gesture with her hand like asking us to come closer, and so we did, making a circle.

- That is what I had to talk to you before the competition, I want you to be prepared, this can't shake your confidence but I need to you to be aware of this so you won't be shocked when you get your score.

- You are starting to get me worried. What is it? – Abigail asked serious.

- A few years ago The National Academy would win every single spot to the international round of The Prix de Fonteyn, repeatedly. You can tell the other schools did not like it and they accused the Academy of buying the judges votes. It was terrible to our institution and it ruined our winning sequences. Since the scandal the judges seem to be neglecting our students, they are getting low score time after time, _way_ too low score.

- You mean, the dancers are doing it good but the judges are not giving the points they deserve? – Christian said, causing everyone to look at him.

- Exactly. I don't want to scare you and that is why I told you before, don't let this shake your confidence, I know it's hard, but you can't let it confuse your heads, if you do great and don't get much of a good score at least you know why. – She looked at all of us, one by one, we all had the same scared look – All I'm going to ask from you is to do your best, I've seen all of you dance before and if you have made it this far, you've deserved it. You deserve to be here, and if you do your best then you'll deserve to win.

- So it is like they already know we won't get a good score even before they see we dance. Why to try then? – Grace looked disgusted.

- Because this is our chance to change it! – Ben said optimist – It doesn't matter how it was years ago, all that matters is what happens from now on. I don't know about you, but I'll work my butt off and do everything I can to get one of those spots. Who is with me?

We looked at each other and suddenly everybody was smiling. We knew what we had to do. That was a competition; we were competing against all those amazing other dancers, we were competing between ourselves, and now, we were competing against the judges. That's a lot to handle, but no one ever said it was going to be easy.

There was a voice calling in the speaker telling the girls to get ready for the classical round, we were up first.

- Are you ready for this? – Miss. Raine asked now smiling, was that excitement?

- Yes! – Me, Abigail and Grace answered.

- Then I guess its Showtime. – She said walking out of the backstage to take her sit in the audience.

- Good luck girls! – Grace said – Let the best win.

- Good luck! – I answered but Abigail just smiled uncomfortable.

- Hey, do you know where Kat is? – I asked them.

- She was here like five minutes ago – Abigail answered – She was actually looking for you.

- It seems like everyone has. – I tried to smile – Didn't she say where she was going?

- No, but she must be here soon, she wouldn't miss our performances. Don't worry okay T?

I nodded and Abigail smiled trying to calm me down. They both walked away to take a better spot next to the aisle, and I decided to follow them. I didn't know what was worst: to wait until my performance, or to watch other amazing dancers go on before me, it was just getting me more nervous, and I was up next.

- T! – I heard Kat's voice behind me.

- Kat! – I hugged her – Where were you? I was worried?

- Got a call from my Mom, something about the judges and the competition, she asked me to tell Miss. Raine.

- Well, what was it about?

- I'll fill you in later, I really have to tell Miss. Raine. Like _right now_! I just wanted to wish you good luck before the competition. So good luck – She hugged me again – Now I gotta go.

She left before I could say anything. I would perform in less than a minute, I could feel the adrenaline rising, I was ready to close my mind to the rest of the world and focus on the performance, but then…

- Anxious? – A guy said behind me putting his hand on my shoulder.

- Yes. – I turned to face him.

- I need to talk to you.

- Whatever it is Christian it will have to wait. Right now is not exactly the best time.

- I know. After today's round, before you go back to the residence, can you meet me outside?

- Okay.

- Tara Webster – a voice in the speaker said – Representing the National Academy of Dance.

My time had come, I turned away from him ready to enter the stage but suddenly I felt his hand on mine.

- Good luck! – He said smiling.

I couldn't help but smile back. It made me feel great, just to know he was there to support me even after our argument; I still had him to be there for me.

I entered the stage. Now was my moment, the one I've been waiting for. It felt like I'd been preparing myself for a life time to get to that place, to have this performance. As I waited for my song to start I felt the spotlights shinning in my face, I could feel people's eyes on me, but all the anxiety, all the fears, all the doubts and all the pain seemed to disappear as soon as I stepped in the center of stage. I could feel like I was at home and suddenly some old words came to my mind making me smile widely.

_"Someday this theater will be filled with people, and they are all going to be here to see you."_


	30. Chapter 30

30-Chrisitan

She is gifted, no questions asked. As soon as Tara started dancing a big smile started to grow on my face, and I was completely unable to control it. Every step she dances makes me want to join her; it is so easy when we dance. It is literally communicating without words, which is a great way for _me_ to communicate, it keeps me from saying anything stupid and ruining the moment.

I knew I had strong feelings about Tara, I knew I loved her, but this time I felt different, I felt proud. I was so proud of her because of everything she had gone through to get to this and finally take that stage, and I was so happy to be part of her life, part of the things that made her be who she is, part of the reason she was here.

- Watch out dude, you are drooling. – I voice said behind me in between laughs.

- Very funny Ben. – I said without looking at him.

- Don't laugh, I mean it.

- I'm not laughing. – I faced him, my tone unconsciously became serious.

- Okay, sorry, I forgot you are not much of a fan of my sense of humor. – He didn't say anything else for a few seconds, but when I was about to turn away he spoke again – I need to talk to you. We need to… solve some things.

- I agree. What is it that you wanna solve?

- Can we talk about this somewhere else, like now? I don't want Tara near; she will think we are having an argument or something.

- And will we?

- Will we what? – He seemed confuse.

- Have an argument? - I looked at him suspicious.

- Hopefully not. – He took a deep breath - Come on, let's get out of here.

I followed Ben to the hallway, we were literally the only ones there and if it wasn't for the music coming from the theater everything would be silent. We walked over to the end of the hallway and I just kept following him, until he decided to stop.

- I think we can talk now. – I nodded – Okay Christian, spill it, what is wrong this time? Sammy told me you and Tara are having a hard time – Sammy, that betrayer – What happened? Everything was cool this morning.

- No, it wasn't Ben. Things weren't cool at all.

- Okay, let's just skip this; I give up on guessing, what do you think I did this time? What kind of diabolical plan have I prepared for today? – He had a crocked smile in his face.

- Everything is just a joke for you, right Ben?

- No, but I try to face things in a better way than you do. You shouldn't take everything so serious.

- Interesting point. Then, how should I deal with the fact that you love my girlfriend? – I said in a serious tone, as I crossed my arms.

- I told I'd back off; I don't know what the problem is now.

- Oh right, you said you'd back off, yeah, that was right after you waited for Tara to come downstairs all night to have sometime alone with her, because that is _exactly_ something people do when they are backing off.

- I needed to talk to her. I had some explaining to do, and so I did. I told you I would back off and let her choose, and I promise I won't try taking her from you as long as you guys are together, but don't expect me to stop talking to her. That is _not_ gonna happen.

- Then what is that you had to talk to her that took all night long to be solved?

- It was a couple hours, come on dude; we hadn't talked for a month.

- That doesn't answer my question.

- It was personal, it was about me and her, so I don't need to tell you.

- You kind of do.

- Do I? - He said ironically, raising one eyebrow.

- Yes, you do. You wanted to know what happened. So here it is, me and Tara had an argument.

- Wow, now tell me the news – He kept his tone ironical.

- It was because of you… Again.

- I don't remember doing anything to cause trouble. Are you sure you are not creating that stuff on your head? What is that you call it? Oh right, you are paranoid.

- Yeah… I'm sure I'm no creating it, and you did cause trouble, but you are not helping me here. We had an argument because of your talk, and that's why you need to tell me what it was about.

- We told you, it was just an innocent talk, but if you want to know so badly, okay, there is nothing _that_ secret. I just apologized for making her sad about the whole surprise thing; I didn't mean to make her life harder.

- Well, you did a pretty good job for a person that didn't mean it.

- I _also_ told her that I would back off, just like I told you, the difference is that Tara actually believed in me. And I told her that if her friendship was all I could get now, it was okay.

- I don't see why you would do that. – I faced him coming one step closer, God how I wished I could read his mind.

- Because I care about her, and I know that she wants us to be okay with each other. That is the _only_ reason why I decided to back off.

- So you are doing it for her?

- Yes.

- And you want to be okay with me?

- If that is what it takes for her to be happy, and if that is going to stop all this drama. I'm kind of sick of it, aren't you? – He laughed in the last part, trying to break the tension.

I looked at his face and somehow, I'm not sure why, I believed in him. Sammy was probably right, Ben could never be evil; he is just a guy who loves a girl that doesn't love him back, at least that is what I was hopping.

- Fine. – I said, now less serious.

- So you believe me? – He asked surprised.

- No, but I'll give it a shoot; maybe I can learn how to be okay with you.

- Look, we were friends, I don't know how could we get so mad at each other, but I didn't mean to make you hate me.

- I don't. Believe it or not, I don't.

- Well, you must be a great actor then. – He laughed.

- I don't hate you Ben, yes, I'm kind of mad at you, but hate is such a strong word, I'm not willing to use it. As long as we don't have much more reason to fight, I guess we can…

- Be friends? – He interrupted me.

- I don't know, let's try to _deal_ with each other first – I said laughing – If we both stay alive after a while, maybe we can be friends.

- Is this all you wanted? For me to back off?

- Yes.

- The only reason we became "frenemies"?

- Look, after everything I went through with Tara, I wanted to make up with her, and when she was admitted back in the Academy the only person she would talk to was you. So I sort of put the blame for that whole thing on you, starting with the walkie talkie. Everything that was happening didn't make me the happiest guy in the world I think you noticed; you were kind of an obstacle.

- And now that I'm not…

- I have no reason to fight against you.

- So what should we do now? Hug? – He opened his arms, but Ben was obviously kidding about it.

- I think a handshake will be okay. – I extended my hand for him to shake.

- So are we cool?

- We are trying to be, which I guess for _us_ is a beginning.

- I agree.

- Look Ben, I'm trusting you here. Don't make me regret it okay? – I looked at him serious, and he did the same… for like 5 seconds until he broke down laughing.

- Dude you are so dramatic. You have to stop that, seriously.

- Okay – I laughed with him – But you…

- I promised you – he interrupted me controlling his laughter – Trust my word.

I nodded as a yes and turned around; but as I started to walk Ben called me again.

- Hey Christian – I turned and looked at him – When I said all I want is Tara to be happy, I meant it.

- What do you mean?

- I mean that I'm trusting you here too, so don't break her again. – He had his eyes worried.

- I won't. – I answered surely and turned around.

I walked back into the theater and Tara was there with Abigail watching Grace's dance. As she saw me she smiled, I did the same. Today would be such a long day of forgiveness. I was done with Ben (kind of), and later I would finally put things on the right place with Tara.

_**Author's Note: Hey guys! I wanted to thank you all soooo much for the reviews, they always put a smile in my face! Two new chapters up, hope you like it! Keep reading! :D**_


	31. Chapter 31

31-Tara

- She was great… Shit! – Abigail said breaking my gaze with Christian, bringing me back to real life – Tara, did you hear what I said?

- Oh yeah, sure, Grace right? – I tried to seem interested - Come on Abigail; try to be happy for her.

- Tara, face it, she is competition, _tough_ competition.

- No need to worry Abigail, you did great too.

- So did you but… Look at _her_, it's so annoying the way Grace always gets what she wants, it doesn't matter how.

- Stop talking like she had already won! The Abigail I know would never give up.

Grace left the stage with a smile, I little cocky I would say, she walked straight to us.

- So, how did I do? – She said cheerfully.

- Amazing Grace. – I answered.

- You did good… - Abigail turned around and walked away.

- She really doesn't like me. – Grace looked at me, still smiling.

- You gave her reasons, don't you think?

- That was months ago Tara, and Abigail was my friend why can't she just get over it? She is being so dramatic.

- She is not Grace. Have you ever apologized? _That_ would help her get over it. – I tried not to seem as pissed as I was; I hated to see Grace blaming Abigail for something that was her fault – Why don't you accept that you made this happen?

- I thought you got over it Tara. I don't get why everyone thinks I'm so mean, I'm not, I just like to make jokes, it is their problem if they don't get my sense of humor.

- Jokes? Sense of humor? You know what, whatever Grace; I have somewhere else to be. – I couldn't believe she was serious about that.

- Where are you going? The boys' round will start in twenty minutes!

- I'll be here on time. Bye Grace.

I left the theater hoping she hadn't followed me. I had forgiven Grace for what she did, with the hope she would change or at least try, but she is the same person she had always been. Playing with people, saying terrible things, putting hidden meanings on every word she speaks, and always justifying it with jokes. I was losing any good feeling I once had for her, and as much as I wanted to convince myself we could still be friends, being around her doesn't seem right anymore.

I walked over to the dressing room, I didn't really had somewhere else I had to be, I just needed Grace to believe that so I could stay away from her for a while. I decided to change my clothes; I wouldn't have any other performance on that day, so why stay with that uncomfortable garment?

In a little time I was done, so I decided to return to the theater as it was time to the masculine classical round, and later we would know our score. That was the scary part. At least after such a big day I would finally get the chance to work things out with Christian, talking with him before my performance, hearing him wishing me good luck and know that he was there to give me support made me more confident, made me feel better, made me trust myself, just like Ben said.

Even thought we had that moment we still had to talk, I was waiting for that, I knew exactly what I had to tell him. He will never have to doubt what I have with Ben, because Ben was only my friend, but Christian… He was my boyfriend.

When I got to the backstage again, Abigail was in the corner with Sammy and Ben, I could also see Grace talking to a guy that I couldn't recognize, but she was far from them. Christian on the other hand, I couldn't find him anywhere.

I decided to take a look in the aisle on the side of the stage, he wasn't there either, but I found Kat and Miss. Raine talking.

- Hi Kat, Miss. Raine – I said greeting them.

- Hey T! – Kat hugged me, she didn't seem to be on a hurry or worried like she was before my performance.

- Hello Tara! – Miss. Raine smiled at me and looked back to Kat – Katrina; please tell your mother that the Academy is really grateful! She was crucial on this case; I hope to have the chance to thank her personally.

- I'll tell her Miss. Raine. – Kat answered.

- Well, girls, I have to find the boys, they are next, I will see you again when it's time to get the scores.

- Sure Miss. Raine. – I replied as she turned around and walked over to Sammy and Ben.

- Thank God everything is solved. – Kat said, she was probably thinking out loud.

- Sorry Kat, but what are you talking about? And why were you in such a hurry before?

- It is a long, _long_ story…

- Is it bad?

- It could have been bad for us, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but thanks to my Mom things are probably back on the right place.

- I still don't get it! What is this about?

- Well… It is basically about the judges. You know the story, right?

- The thing about them neglecting the Academy's students?

- Yeah… Something like that. A week ago my Mom was attending to an opening party; she talked to a guy, that knows a guy, that is marriage to a woman that is the sister of one of the judges. – I tried to assimilate what she said and Kat laughed at my face – I know, it is confused. They were talking about The Prix and the guy was kind of drunk which I think is probably the reason what he said what he did, otherwise he would have never admitted…

- Kat! – I interrupted her – What is the point?

- Oh right, sorry – She laughed – Well, this guy was kind of drunk and he let out that the judges had already agreed on the score they would give to the Academy students, like _before_ the competition. This has apparently been going for some years now, and well, my mom for some reason decided she could do something.

- Well let me think Kat, why would your Mom decide to help? _Maybe_ because she is one of the most famous dancers in the _whole world_, but who knows right? I'm just guessing. – I said ironically.

- Fine – She laughed again – Maybe. The thing is that she knows people, like important people, and she has a friend that is organizing this competition. She told what she knew and this woman decided to check.

- And… What did she get from that?

- It seems like one of the judges has a nephew competing, and other judge just received a big amount of money out of the blue, it simply appeared on the bank.

- How did they find that out? I mean, are we all part of a big investigation no? And the FBI guys, will they show at any moment?

- No Tara, it is all about knowing the right people and well, my mom is great doing that. Besides, in this case, a little threat of putting the press into it and everything is solved.

- So what happens now?

- These two judges I told you; they were replaced, and now the others know people are keeping an eye on it so I think they won't do anything stupid.

- I can't believe someone tried to buy their spots to the International Round.

- Tara don't be so naïve. The Prix de Fonteyn is like the World Cup of Ballet, four students will represent the entire country on a worldwide competition, and some people are willing to do whatever it takes to get those spots.

- I know but… It doesn't seem right!

- Because it is not! Let's just hope everything goes on the way it should be now. By the way you did great at your performance T!

- Thanks Kat! – That was all I could say until a voice in the speaker called the boys for their classical round.

I looked around and I saw Miss. Raine, Ben and Sammy talking. All I could think about was: where the hell was Christian?


	32. Chapter 32

32-Christian

I don't know why I was hiding in the shadows while wanting for my performance. After my talk with Ben I changed my clothes, and I have to admit I couldn't fell more awkward on that classical "costume". But that wasn't the reason why I didn't want to see anyone.

I was nervous, and when I say nervous I mean freaking the _hell out_. I could start to imagine how Tara must feel when she has one of those freak outs. I could see Miss. Raine talking to Ben and Sammy from across the stage, I choose not to have one of those motivational speeches, and they never helped anyway. Listening to Miss. Raine telling how proud she was or asking us to do our best was just _not_ what I needed right now. I had to get this right; I really had to make it.

I also saw Tara, _she must be looking for me_; I thought with myself, I wish she was, but should I talk to her now? I love her, but when it comes to me and Tara you never know… It could be: "Good Luck" and a kiss or not… It could be just her yelling at me and… You know what; let's stay with the first one.

I heard the judges making the last call for the dancers to get ready on backstage. A bunch of guys started to move on the aisles trying to get a good spot next to the stage and then I missed Tara in the middle of the crowd. I decided to just stay still in one of the dark corners in the background until it was time for my performance.

- There you are. – A relieved voice spoke next to me.

Tara was looking at me with calm, but still, worried eyes.

- Here I am. – I tried to seem natural.

- What is wrong? I couldn't find you anywhere, I was getting worried.

- I was here all the time, just… Concentrating.

- You can tell me Christian. – She said touching my arm softly.

- Tell you what?

- What is going on. I get that you are nervous, but why are you here alone? Miss. Raine wanted to talk to you and the other boys.

- I just needed to think, I had to be alone and I couldn't listen to any of Miss. Raine's lectures right now. – I said sitting in the ground, Tara did the same.

- Should I be worried? You seemed fine half an hour ago.

- Let's just say, today is going to be such a long day.

- Is this about what happened this morning? – She looked down; her voice was breaking in the end.

- No. – I brought her chin up with my finger, whispering – This is about me, I'm just nervous.

- I'm sorry about what happened. – She could now look at me in the eyes again.

- Me too. – I hugged her.

- You were right, we have been spending no time together and after you left today I got frozen. Sammy told me I spent two hours sitting in the couch doing nothing. – She held me tighter.

- It is okay, I shouldn't have freaked out about you and Ben. I talked to Sammy too. And… I also talked to Ben. – She let go of the hug and looked at me surprised, waiting for me to finish – We had to clear some things out, and so we did.

- Really? – She raised an eyebrow.

- Really. – I could see the smile growing bigger in her face – I don't want to let anything break us apart Tara, and I was doing it myself. I guess I'll just have to trust you, because I can't let this thing with Ben get in the middle of…

She kissed me, just like that. Pure and simple; out of nowhere. Tara hold on to me tighter than I ever imagined possible and I did the same with her. I could feel her fingers in my hair and all I could think about was how happy I was in that moment. When we let go of the kiss we just stared at each other smiling.

- So what was that? – I asked still surprised.

- Was it to subtle for you? It was a kiss.

- Yeah, I got that part but where did that come from?

- From a girl that is in love with her boyfriend.

- Wait – I tried not to seem so shocked – Did you just say _boyfriend_?

- Yes… - Tara blushed a little.

- So we…

- Yes…

I kissed her again but then I heard my name called on the speakers.

- That is my cue. – I said holding her face in between my hands.

- Okay, good luck then. – She pecked my lips.

I stood up and entered the stage. I felt the lights shinning in my face, making it feel warmer; as the music started to play I knew everything would work out. At every turn I did through my performance I knew Tara was there, in the backstage cheering for me, waiting for me with a big smile on her face. I couldn't control the smile in my face just to picture us together again.

I couldn't believe I was so nervous about that performance, everything worked out perfectly, but that of course was just my point of view. As I entered the backstage again Sammy was waiting for me, and behind him I could see Tara smiling.

- You did it great Christian! You killed it! – Sammy was saying, not that I was really concentrating on him, I think he noticed where I was looking at – Hey dude, can't you at least pretend you are listening to me?

- What? Yeah… Sure Sammy. – I tried to walk to Tara but he held my arm.

- Hey wait. You guys are good again? Did you follow my advice?

- Yeah Sammy I did… Can you let go of my arm now?

- Oh sorry, go, live, be in love! Ignore your best friend! – He yelled ironically as I walked over to Tara.

She was a few feet behind Sammy, and as soon as she noticed I had finished my talk with him Tara started to walk fast towards me until she gave me a hug.

- You were so amazing! I'm so proud of you! – She said cheerfully.

- Thanks – I let go off the hug, but held her to the waist, so we could face each other – It was because of you.

- Me? – She raised one eyebrow.

-Yeah, you. If it wasn't for our talk…

- Talk? – She interrupted me smiling.

- If it wasn't for _that_ – I laughed – I wouldn't have danced the way I did, I was nervous and I had way too many worries in my head. Our _talk_ – She laughed at the word again – made all my worries drift away.

- I'm glad we _talked_. – She pecked my lips – I needed that too.

- So… _Girlfriend_, what do you want to do now?

- I don't know, _boyfriend_, I think we should wait to get our score. – She made a funny disappointed face when saying the last word.

- Well after that…

- Yes. – Tara embraced my neck, our faces were inches apart.

- I think we should finally do something special, just the two of us.

- I totally agree. – She smiled, looking deep in my eyes.

I tried to kiss her, but in the exact second my lips touched hers…

- What do you think you are doing? – Miss. Raine's voice seemed angry – Right now, is not the right time, and here is clearly not the right place to do that. You, Tara, have already disappointed me once today, you shouldn't be late and you shouldn't be doing… _This_, either. And Christian where were you? No one could find you; I thought you would drop out of the competition. Both of you need to understand you can't just disappear in such important moments like this, that is completely irresponsible. I don't want to see this kind of behavior until the end of the competition, any of it, do I made myself clear? – She looked at us with a disappointed face, her eyes raging.

- Yes Miss. Raine. – Tara answered, I just nodded. She gave us one last angry look and left going straight to Abigail, Sammy and Grace.

- So not now… - Tara looked at me sad.

- Later tonight. – I said smiling.

- I missed you. – She hugged me again.

- I missed you too. – I hugged her, kissing the top of her head.

- Tara, Christian, come join us, I need to speak to all of you. – Miss. Raine yelled; Tara and I headed to where the rest of the crew was.

_**Author's Note: Once again, I'm sorry for making you guys wait so long! Good news is that in two days I'll have a small break from school, I'll try to update more often. Anyway hope you enjoy these new chapters, and thanks for the reviews! Keep Reading :D**_


	33. Chapter 33

33-Tara

Miss. Raine was finally done with her speech, yes speech, considering it looked like hours of her going on and on and on about how good we did, how proud she was of our growth and I have to admit, in the first _twenty_ minutes of it, I was touched. After that me and everyone else, were obviously and completely bored, not that Miss. Raine noticed, she was having a moment there, a _long_ moment.

She apparently had an excellent timing though, because just as she finished, there was a voice in the speaker calling out the dancers to get their scores, so we knew, the make it or break it time had arrived.

One by one the dancers were called on the stage, the girls were first. We knew that only two boys and two girls, would go on to represent Australia in the international round of the Prix. So… No pressure, no pressure _at all_.

I was almost jumping on the stage, and I would have, the only think keeping me from doing that was Christian's hand strongly holding mine and keeping me next to him. I knew I was shaking, and I'm sure he noticed. Actually, I think pretty much anyone could see how freaked out I was, but after everything Miss. Raine had told us about the judges, I had my reasons to.

- Try not to freak out until you go up there okay? – Christian looked at me with a smile, but he was obviously concerned too.

- A little too late for that, don't you think? – I said nervously looking at him.

- Hey, look – He squeezed my hand a little harder – No matter what happens we still have tomorrow's contemporary round, and if after that one of us or maybe neither of us make it, it is okay. I just want you to know how proud I am of you.

- I'm proud of you too. – I said pecking his lips real quick, I wasn't longing for another lecture today.

It took ten seconds after our little talk for my name to be called on the speaker. Suddenly all the urge I had to jump on stage disappeared and I felt like my legs wouldn't move at all. I felt Christian's hand on my back, softly pushing me to enter the stage. I could feel my knees shaking, my hands sweating, and I was also pretty sure that I would stumble over my own feet at any moment. Surprisingly though, I managed to get to the center of the stage, as gracefully as I possibly could in this situation.

I stand there facing the judges faking the best smile I could, but I was sure I looked like I was being tortured… I kind of was. I waited for what? Twenty seconds? Well, for me, standing there, it looked like a few hours.

- Tara Webster – I froze as soon as I heard the woman calling my name again– Representing the National Academy of Dance – I could feel my lungs getting out of air, but I was too nervous to take a deep breath, all I could think about was how bad I wanted to leave that place – Classical Round Score: 7.5

I instantly and unconsciously gave up on all my efforts to smile, even if it was just to keep a good image for them. 7.5? Are you kidding me? I realized by their looks it was my turn to leave the stage. I tried to smile for one last time, took a small bow and left. I couldn't cry, scream, in fact, I couldn't react at all. 7.5? I couldn't believe that.

I found Christian looking at me tense, and it was clear he didn't know how to react either. As I came closer to him he just opened his arms and I let myself fall on them.

- I can't believe this. – I said in denial, my voice was starting to broke in what seemed to be sobs, but I was definitely not crying this time, not here, not now.

- You did great! And you know that. Miss. Raine told us about this, we knew the chances this would happen were big.

- But after everything Kat told me, and her Mom talked to so many people… This, just wasn't supposed to happen. – I said holding tighter to his waist trying to control myself.

- I know, but things are not always the way they should be – He said softly and kissed the top of my head.

Grace's name was called on the speakers. I looked over to the stage again, watching her confident walk to her spot, she was smiling widely, a little cocky as usual.

- Grace Whitney. Representing the National Academy of Dance. Classical Round Score: 8.3. – Said one of the judges.

Grace looked shaken, but I can't be completely sure how she was feeling, she was Grace in the end. She came back with a serious face and joined me and Christian.

- 8.3? Are they serious about this? – She said in rage.

- I thought you didn't care about this kind of stupid ballet stuff. – Christian said still holding onto my waist.

- No, I mean, it is not that I _care_ so much… This is just, so… Unfair. Do they think this is a joke? I'm not laughing. – She said almost yelling.

- Great, now you know how all of us feel about your sense of humor. – I said without thinking.

Grace looked at me so surprised I wish I could have taken a picture of her face. Her jaw dropped, and for a few seconds Grace looked uncomfortable and probably for the first time since I met her, she was lost of her words. Seeming like she couldn't come up with any answer instantly she turned her back to us and walked away.

- Okay, so where did that come from? – Christian said laughing.

- What? It was the truth.

- I know. I just didn't except _you_ to say that to her face.

- Someone had to put Grace on her place, and right now I don't really care about what she thinks. I'm done with all this.

- Wow – He said looking at me proudly – I like this confident Tara I have here.

- Yeah, it only took what? A few deceptions to get to this point. – I laughed.

- Come on Tara. Your score wasn't even that bad. Trust in yourself and do even better tomorrow.

- Yeah, but Grace's…

- Oh – He interrupted me – So is that what this is all about?

- No… I mean… Yes. It is frustrating to see Grace being the way she is, and still getting the best in every situation.

- Look Tara – He put one of his hands on my face – The judges are not interested in the kind of person Grace is, they will judge her dance and the character she plays for them on stage. She might even deep within not be that bad, but the fact is that even if the judges won't judge her for personality, the rest of the word will. She will get as many scores and awards as she possibly can, but that won't change the person she is, this selfish girl who push people away. You, on the other hand, Tara, you show us what you are when you are on the stage. You have a passion that she could never fake, and that makes the difference, if not this time, maybe tomorrow, maybe next time. The fact is you can't keep looking up to Grace, there is no comparison in there. – He smiled at me and kissed me softly – You are much better. – He said smiling again.

We kept holding on to each other, while the rest of the girls were called on stage, and God there were lots of them. Abigail, wasn't really happy with her score either, she got a 7.3, but I think that any score she would get that was worst than Grace's would make her upset.

It was my turn to give Christian support. When all the girls had been given their scores, it was the boys' turn. I could feel how anxious Christian was getting, and when I say _feel_ I don't mean by emotional connection. Of course, there was also that, but when I say that I could feel his anxiety I mean that I could feel his hands getting tense, squeezing my arms.

- Put a little more strength in that and you will make me lose one arm… Or maybe both. – I said trying to make him laugh.

- Oh, sorry. – He said trying to laugh, but he was obviously tense.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and as I looked at Christian there was one in his too. I looked back and found Ben nervously smiling at us. He had this worried look in his face, like a little boy scared of the dark.

- Are you okay? – I asked.

- Yeah, never been better. – He said ironically, forcing a laughter.

- You will do good Ben. – Christian said, surprising me.

- I surely hope so. – Ben answered.

We waited for like two minutes until Ben's name was called. He looked like a statue as he walked into the stage, his face was strong and solid, his muscles seemed stuck, and even to see him walking he looked a bit like a robot.

- Benjamin Tickle. Representing the National Academy of Dance. Classical Round Score: 7.5.

Ben looked completely overwhelmed as he walked to me and Christian backstage, he had his head down. It killed me to see Ben like that, he was one of my best friends and now he was so down and frustrated, it hurt to see him. I walked towards him and gave him a hug. There was no need to say anything. I knew exactly how he was feeling. He had received the same score I did, but it was not even quite because of that. It seemed like being there with him, hugging him we could understand each other, and console each other.

We both walked over to Christian, he still had the same tense fake smile in his face, but just as we reached his side, it was his turn to go on stage. I felt a weird feeling inside of me, different than when I waited for my score, or Ben's. I was so nervous I couldn't even understand it. My fists were strongly locked to my body, and unfortunately all I could do was wait for the result.

- Christian Reed. Representing the National academy of Dance. Classical Round Score…


	34. Chapter 34

34-Christian

I stood there facing those people, completely strangers to me, who were supposed to somehow judge my performance. I tried not to over think all I had done until that moment. I tried to put my mind in any other place but the one I was standing, in the center of the stage, right in the spotlight waiting for the numbers that would label how successful I had been on this competition, one of the few things I had taken serious in my life until now.

- Christian Reed. Representing the National academy of Dance. Classical Round Score: 7.2.

As much as I tried to prepare myself for the worst, as much as I tried to think that something like that would happen at any second, I couldn't help the shocked look on my face that followed those words.

I nodded and took a bow, walking off stage. I knew how incredibly frustrated I was looking, that was exactly how I was feeling. I was attempting to keep in mind Mss. Raine's words; about how proud she was of us, and that our score wouldn't necessarily be according to our performance, but still I felt terrible.

Tara gave me a hug, it was like I was having a flashback of moments ago, when she had to get her score, and I could finally understand how she felt.

To be really honest, after that I didn't really pay attention to anything anyone was saying, and it was obvious how Tara didn't too. We just stood together, listening to all those speeches, and I was starting to realize how pissed everybody else was too. Especially Sammy, he had received a 6.9.

- There is no need to be desperate, students. Tomorrow you all will have the second chance I'm sure you are waiting for. I realize many of you are not happy with your scores, but before you start blaming the judges based on the facts I listed earlier, I want all of you to think about your performances today. The things you could have done better, and also the things you are proud of, that is the way to the improvement.

- But Miss. Raine, do you think the judges have something to do with our bad scores? – Abigail asked.

- Of course they do – Grace sounded ironic – They are the ones to give us them.

- Ok Grace, whatever. – Abigail said, not even looking to Grace, keeping her stare focused on Miss. Raine.

- I'm not sure Abigail. After everything Mrs. Karamakov done, I was positive these judges would be fair, at least a little. But I do agree with you. Some of these scores were…

- Ridiculous? – Sammy said angry.

- Unexpected. – Miss. Raine continued, giving him a disapproval look for having interrupted her – Now I want you to go back to the residence, rest for these next hours, take a good night of sleep. Tomorrow morning I expect all of you here, _on time_! – She said starting at me and Tara.

That being said, we left the Opera House, you can picture how _incredibly _excited we were after everything that had happened. You could tell by our face not only how tired we were, but our frustration was obvious too.

- So, what do we do now? – Tara said in the cab, we, Sammy and Abigail had taken.

- Forget all our dreams. – Sammy said in the same angry/sad tone he had in the theatre.

- Sammy come on! – Abigail was the one to sound pissed now – We are all sad with our scores, but you going on and on about that won't help at all!

Sammy looked like he would say something back but instead he just took a deep breath and looked down, trying to control himself. After that the ride was silent to the residence. No one was in the mood for talking anymore. As we reached the building, paid the driver and left the cab, Sammy and Abigail walked straight in, still not talking to each other. I was about to go in when I felt Tara's hand on my arm.

- Do you mind taking a walk with me?

- Of course not – I said smiling – I think we need it.

We walked over to the pier, and when we got there it was almost sunset. We had stopped in the café to buy ourselves some food as neither of us had ate anything besides some cookies at the Opera House since breakfast.

Tara and I sat on the end of the pier, she had her back against my chest and I embraced her in a hug which made her smile. Being there together after so many time apart was everything I needed after a day like this. We were looking at the beautiful sunset, and as cliché as it seems, that moment truly was one of the best I had during the day.

- I'm worried about Sammy. – She whispered.

- Why?

- His score was the worst out of all the others. I don't know if he can make it.

- We don't know if any of us will make it, Training Bra. It would be harder for him, true, but let's not forget it is Sammy we are talking about. After working so much to get here, he wouldn't just simply give up.

- I hope so. – She said, intertwining her fingers in mine – The real reason I wanted to come here though, is because I wanted us to keep our promise, and spent some time together, away from all the stress and the drama.

- Me too.

- Isn't it weird to think that the year is almost ending? – She said with her voice hurt, like there was something worrying her.

- I don't know; we have been through so much this year.

- But doesn't it seem like it started yesterday?

- Sometimes. I mean, sometimes it seems like it is passing way too fast, but sometimes, especially in moments like this, with all this Prix stuff, everything seem in slow motion.

- I know what you mean. Like today, getting my score. The time seemed to slow down as I waited in the stage.

- Here we go, we are talking about The Prix again, you know. – I said laughing at us.

- Well, you brought it up – Tara laughed too – But I agree. Let's just not talk about this stuff. Not now. What do you want to talk about?

- I want to know why you sound so sad when we talk about the end of the year. Why is it so bad? – I let go of our hug, and sat next to her, holding her hand.

- Oh… That. – She looked down for a few seconds, like planning what she was about to say, until she finally looked up again – I have been thinking about it lately. The thing I really thought about until today actually is the end of this year. How will it be? We are second year, and when this year is over, we will be heading to our last year. We will be seniors and the pressure will be on with the competition for the company's contracts.

- I know. – I said realizing how hard next year would be.

- The thing is that even with all those other worries about our carriers, our future in dance. Do you know what the only thing I could think about was? – She looked at me with a shy smile.

- What?

- _You_. – I tried not to look surprised, but I'm sure I did – _Us_, actually. – Her face suddenly turned a little bit more worried.

- Why is that? What is worrying you? – I said softly putting part of her hair behind her ear so I could see her face better.

- I don't know. It suddenly hit me that, after this year things will be crazier than ever, and we will be having our last year together at the Academy. I'm sorry for the time we have wasted, the time we could be together but we weren't.

- Why did all this come out now? – I said taking her face in between my hands. Tara looked like she would cry at any second, but it was obvious how hard she was trying to be strong and hold the tears.

- I'm afraid. I'm afraid of losing you next year. Or even before that. You know how crazy I get with the Academy sometimes; I don't want to ruin everything. And I'm afraid that we don't stay together after that.

- It is more than one year away; there is no need to think about that now. – I said trying to calm her down.

- Yes, there is. Because it will be like you said, one of us can make it to The Prix and the other don't, just like that, one of us can make it to the Company and the other don't. And if that happens…

- Tara – I interrupted her gently, I turned my body to her, looking deep in her eyes – You don't need to regret the time we missed with the fights, the arguments the drama or anything else, because all the mistakes and misunderstandings we had in the way brought us to this moment, made us be what we are now. You don't need to worry about next year, none of us can tell what will happen ten minutes from now, so plan and freak out about our senior year is pointless. But more than anything, you don't need to worry about us… I can't tell you that we will be together forever, get marriage, have children, because that would totally go against my argument that we don't know what future holds. But that is exactly my point, if we don't know; we can never tell what will or won't happen. If you think about it, after all our ups and downs, for us to be together now it's a little miracle, but it happened anyway, because it _had_ to. I don't know if I believe in such a thing as fate. But I do believe that sometimes what has to be will be, so if we are meant to be together we _will_.

A few tears had escaped her eyes, but Tara had a shy little smile in her face. She whipped the tears away with her thumbs, looking at me like never so in love before.

- Are you okay? – I asked.

- Yes, I just can't believe I'm crying again – She laughed at herself – Is just that what you said it so… - She couldn't finish.

- I know. I understand what you mean. – I smiled at her – Do you think it is time to go back? It is starting to get dark. I think you might want to take some rest, be brand new for tomorrow – I motioned to get up but she held my hand and pulled me back down, back to my spot next to her.

- No, let's stay here. I don't want to go back now. – She looked at me blinking her eyes, like begging.

- Okay. – I looked at her smiling and looked back to the sunset, by now the sun was almost completely hidden.

- Christian – She whispered making me look at her again – I love you.

I smiled too and kissed her and she kissed me back, passionately. No one was there to interrupt this time. It was just me, Tara and the sunset and it was… Perfect.


	35. Chapter 35

35 – Tara

I think I blacked out. The last thing I remember is going to sleep after that afternoon I spent with Christian, and it seemed like I woke up here. Already on my outfit, already with my hair and makeup done, already warmed up and this time, I was _on time_.

I don't know if I reached a point where my concentration was so high I just ignored everything and everyone else, or if I was just so anxious that my brain couldn't retain any information about the things I had done earlier that morning.

- So are you ready? - I heard Ben's voice behind me.

- As ready as I will ever be. - I said, strangely confident about today's performance.

- Seems like someone got over the last round's score. - Ben said putting his arm on my shoulders, and joined me looking at the girl dancing her routine.

- Score? Which score? - I laughed.

- Now _that_ is what I am talking about. - He laughed too.

- Have you seen Christian? I thought he would be here. - I asked.

- Last time I saw him he was with Sammy. Problems with Sammy's Dad, I think Christian was giving him some support. I would be there with him too, but Miss. Raine needed to talk to me.

- What kind of problems? – I asked getting a little worried.

- Nothing that you should worry about now, okay? Christian and Sammy must get here at any moment, and we are all gonna be watching your performance.

Another girl was called on stage, and I would be next. Why wasn't I freaking out?

- I have missed your company lately. – Ben said.

- I've missed you too. But things are just so crazy right. We never get to relax and have a good time. – I said realizing how crazy our lives had gotten in the Academy, in this last month – But this ends today, at least for now.

- Yeah, last day of the National Round. _Big day_.

- But every big day has to end sometime, and when this one is over, we get to celebrate! – I said smiling.

- What if none of us make it to the Internationals?

- We still have to celebrate… And a _lot_! – he looked at me confused, making me laugh at his face – Celebrate that we survived this hell.

- I have to agree. – He said, still laughing.

- Ready? – I heard a voice whispering softly against my ear.

I turned around and found Christian looking at me with a big smile. I hugged him, glad he was finally here to see my performance.

- You're not the first one to ask me that. – I said smiling – But yes, I am.

Christian held one of my hands, and as if they had agreed on doing that, Ben did the same. Nothing else had to be said, that was all I had wanted for a long time, both of them, two people that I cared so much about, but in such different ways, finally together with me.

In within a few seconds it was my name that was called on the speakers. Ben let go of my hand with a smile, Christian was about to do the same but first he gave a hug and whispered once again in my ear.

- You _are_ ready. Now go out there, and show it to them.

I smiled at him and entered the stage. This was probably the first time I walked into that stage with no fear; I wasn't sure if my score had something to do with that. After that shock I was now ready for anything. It made me stronger somehow, but that was not the only thing. My conversation with Christian in the day before came back to my head, like he was there with me, every step of my dance.

_"All the mistakes and misunderstandings we had in the way brought us to this moment, made us be what we are now" _It was true, all the mistakes I made through the way, especially the ones that made me want to give up, where the ones to make me improve, to make me become a better dancer.

I could feel the same feeling I had in the Classical Round, that one moment when I started dancing and I could feel right, I could feel in the right place. Every beat fitted perfectly, this time there was not a move I couldn't nail, there was not an arabesque that I couldn't control, there was not an emotion that I could keep to myself, though. I could feel that this time, somehow, I could finally understand what Miss. Raine had told us multiple times. She would go on and on about how dance was about transmitting the emotion, through your moves and expressions. You can't give the public an emotion you are not feeling though, so you have to take your head off of the massive worry of controlling your moves perfectly and let it join your heart, in order to make it real.

The last beat of the song came and I couldn't control the big and satisfied smile in my face. I walked backstage and jumped in Christian's arms, he had a smile just as big as mine and his eyes… Were those tears?

- You were incredible! Amazing! I can't believe it! – He said amused.

- Why can't you believe it? I thought you believed in me. – I faked to be offended.

- You know that is not what I meant! – He said smiling before picking me up and spinning me around – I am _so proud_ of you.

- It was crazy, it was like you were there with me, all the way.

- I know how it feels like. It is like the last time I danced. It was because of you.

We stayed together through the rest of the girls' round. Ben joined us, and eventually Abigail, and even Grace. We were all waiting and giving support for the boys, but as the call for the masculine round was made, no one could find Sammy, and we started to get worried.

- Christian, you were the last one to see him. _Where_ was him? – Abigail said, sounding a little bit desperate. She had looked everywhere, we all did, but she was definitely the one that was most worried about him.

- He was talking to his dad. I was there, but when they started to argue, his father asked me to leave. – Christian answered.

- Argue? – Ben repeated confused.

- Yes, they were talking about the family, and how the Liberman's have always been doctors, same old same old. From what I could get, I think Sammy received an invitation to some sort of pre-college program.

- Why were they arguing about that? Why now? – Abigail seemed more confuse now than she was before.

- Sammy turned the invitation down, without talking to his Dad, and the point is that this program would prepare him for a scholarship, in the same college his father _and_ his grandfather went to. – Christian continued.

- That explains the argument but where is him? – Ben asked again, but just as he finished saying that, his name was called and it was his turn to take the stage – You should talk to Miss. Raine about it. Wish me good luck guys.

- Good luck. – We said in unisonant.

Abigail decided to tell Miss. Raine, and she was clearly not happy about it. We had to get a small version of the same lecture about being late in competition day. Ben returned after the lecture, lucky guy. He seemed happy with his performance, not that we would have known if he really did well, because everybody was searching for Sammy like crazy. I felt bad for Ben, I wish I had watched him perform, I wish I could give him the same support he gave me but I just got lost in my worries, Sammy is not like that, he doesn't just disappear.

Ben had understood, apparently at least, why we couldn't be there for him. Sammy needed this, he _really_ needed this, he had received the worst score out of all of us, and he had to somehow prove to his father that there was a future for him in dance. Ben left the stage and didn't even talk much about his performance, he just told us he thought it was good, and then he left, looking once more for Sammy in the dressing rooms.

A few minutes later it was Christian's turn to be called on stage. He looked at me and I could see it in his eyes. He had been there when Sammy and his father started arguing and he was obviously feeling guilty because he left Sammy alone. It was all clear in his eyes, his fear, his guilt, his worries, and his anxiety, all of that together, it was such a big weight to handle in an important moment like that.

He started walking hesitant into the stage and I was sad to see him so shaken, before he could go I quickly held his arm, and kissed him just as quick.

- Do your best! – I said, and he smiled tense.

The song started and I decided to watch, I was the only one there, everyone had left to look for Sammy. Christian started dancing, but the tension was jumping out of his eyes, and showing how insecure he was in that moment. I just wanted him to do well, to be as great as I knew he could be.

The song started to achieve its climax, the beats were strong and I was hoping Christian would let go at least in the end, have one big moment that could impress the judges, but then…


	36. Chapter 36

36 – Christian

When I fell it was like everything was in slow-motion. It had been fast enough though, for me to be unable to do something to stop myself from falling on my butt. The feeling of failure was terrible, when I felt my body crashing against the floor, I wanted to just lay there for the rest of my life so I wouldn't have to face anyone. In the moment I fell I was so surprised that I had no initial reaction, I had no chance to disguise it, or to control it, and make it a less embarrassing fall, so I just fell, thankfully on my butt, no on my face.

There were some _ohs_ and _ahs_ in the audience at the moment. I could feel those pity eyes on me, while I managed to take all the strength I had left to bring my head up and finish my performance. When my song was over I took one last look at the judges before leaving the stage, I could see it, I could see them calculating how many points I would lose for that fall, but by the disappointed look on their faces I started to ask myself if they would give me any points at all.

I couldn't say it was all because of the argument Sammy and his Dad had, I couldn't say it was his fault, I couldn't pretend I had screwed my performance only because I was worried about him. The real thing was probably what that argument made me feel. It brought back some memories I wasn't longing to have again.

To see Sammy's father yelling at him, and see them telling each other how many times they had been disappointed over the other decisions and actions, reminded me of me and my father, and the arguments I had not necessarily with him, but mostly with myself about him, those were the worst. Why he had left me and my Mom? Weren't we good enough for him? I even remembered how the whole thing with him caused trouble between me and Tara, and I tried to focus on good memories, but there were few of them, and they all have been getting lost, since he is just making the same mistakes again. Making me promises he is not planning to keep. And after his last call last night…

As I walked backstage Tara was there waiting for me, she obviously didn't know how to react, she just gave me a hug, she didn't say anything, and that was probably the best decision she could have made in that moment.

I think we stood there holding one another for a while, it was weird how incredibly perfect we fitted each other, how right it seemed to be with her. She somehow made me feel so much better than I thought I would be after that train wreck I called performance.

We only let go when we saw Sammy walking angrily across us and into the stage, his name had just been called, Abigail was following him, she still seemed really worried.

- What happened? – I asked her – Where did you find him?

- I didn't. I was coming back here to see if he had appeared and I saw Sammy walking to the backstage too. I tried to stop him, and talk to him and he just ignored me and said he couldn't talk now. I think he heard his one minute call, and ran to make his performance.

- Is his Dad still here? – Tara asked, but Abigail couldn't answer.

The three of us walked closer to the aisle as Sammy started dancing. I saw a man arriving in the audience; it was his father; that was for sure. My eyes went back to Sammy, as he started nailing all his moves. He was inspired or something, he had chosen such a strong song, and I remember hearing Miss. Raine giving him the same note multiple times, about being confident and letting the emotion take over him. She told him that if he wanted to dance a song about hurt, disappointment, about overcoming expectations, he would have to feel all of that and let it show. He had certainly achieved that. His moves were secure and strong, and they were all fluid like he was dancing with no choreography, just making all of them up right in that moment.

When he finished there was a moment of silence in the audience, everybody was shocked, and had no reaction at first. Until this one man, in his elegant suit, got up from his seat and started clapping. He looked like he was crying. Yes, definitely, Sammy's Dad was crying. After that the whole audience cheered. Sammy got a standing ovation and then, finally, after his serious, yet strong performance I could see the smile on Sammy's face, as he walked towards us on backstage.

- You killed it dude! – I said giving him a hug.

- You almost killed _us_ too. – Abigail said clearly trying to sound angry, but she was so obviously proud of him, she just sounded completely happy – You disappeared.

- My Dad and I… Long story. But I _had_ to do a good job this time.

- He was there! – Tara said – He seemed so proud of you – She hugged him too.

- We are all proud of you! You did amazing! – Abigail said, and Sammy pecked her lips.

- I'm sorry I made you guys worried. – He said a little embarrassed.

- It's okay. – I said.

- No, it is _not_! - Miss. Raine appeared from behind Sammy, angry burning eyes – Excuse me students, I need to have a private conversation with Samuel.

That was our cue. We left them talking, Abigail just decided to wait for them to finish, but me and Tara left the backstage, walking outside for a while.

- So good to see the sun, to breath fresh air, and don't have to deal with crying ballerinas. – Tara said smiling, holding my hand.

- Yeah. – I just agreed, I realized how sad my voice sounded.

My tone made Tara's smile disappear in her face, she looked at me worried and stopped walking.

- What is wrong? – She asked softly.

- Didn't you see that, I fell.

- Christian, I understand that you are disappointed, but you can't over think this. What is done, is done, and now it is up to the judges, there is nothing we can do anymore.

- It doesn't even sound like you talking. – I tried to smile.

- I know, it is just, I don't know. After yesterday something changed, I feel like the first time I don't have to worry about controlling everything, and everyone.

- I know, I saw it. This was the first time I saw you dancing like that, completely free, not trying to be only technically perfect.

- I have you to thank for that. – She pecked my lips shyly – But I am worried with you. I didn't except that fall to have this effect with you. You said it yourself once, that you didn't even know if you wanted to enter the Company or follow a dance carrier.

- I know. But this… This really meant a lot to me, I really needed to do well, and I couldn't – I stopped for a few second avoiding Tara's look, I knew that if she looked at me in the eye she would notice there was more than that, but since we were silent for a few seconds I decided to just tell her – And…

- And… - Tara raised one eyebrow.

- There is my father.

- What did he do? – She seemed confused – I thought you said you and him were doing better.

- We are or… Were. I don't really know. I thought I knew him, and I thought he had changed but now I just don't know if I can believe him.

- Why?

- He promised me he would stay, and this summer we would spent together, he said he wanted me to know him, and he wanted me to trust him again, he said he wanted to win back the time he had missed.

- But what is wrong about that? – She was almost whispering, her voice was completely comforting.

- Nothing, but it is not going to happen. – I looked aside and took a seat in a bench nearby, letting go of Tara's hand. She followed me.

- Why not? Don't you want to spend your summer with him?

- I do, the problem isn't me not wanting to be with him; the problem is that he is backing out. – She looked at me confused – He is leaving… Again.

Tara had a shocked look, her jaw dropped and she seemed frozen for a few second, like she was afraid of saying anything, I wouldn't blame her.

- I'm… I'm sorry. – She whispered.

- Don't be. I should be used to that by now, right? – I could feel anger growing inside of me.

- When did this happen? When did he tell you?

- Yesterday. After we had dinner, I was at my room and he called me. He freaking called me. All this years, and now that we were finally getting along, and he can't even say to my face he is leaving! A _stupid_ call, is it all I get? Don't I deserve better? – I was about to get up but she held strongly to my hands keeping me in my sit.

- Hey, look at me! – She held my shoulders and looked straight to my eyes, her look was determinate, but her voice was really calm – Yes, you do deserve better than that. Your father, he just got you back and he might be scared too, Christian, but that is not an excuse, I agree with you. You can't let this shake you so much thought. I know I can only imagine how hard it is for you, but you know I will be here, for you, whenever you need me. So, just tell me how to help you.

I looked at her, amazed to realize how Tara had grown since we met, and how much I did too. I think we went through so much together that at this point, no matter what we will always have something especial, this need to be there for each other.

- You want to know how to help me… - I gave her a soft kiss – But you already have - I was about to kiss her again, when I heard someone yelling towards us.

- Hey, lovers, yes I'm talking to you – I turned my head to see Sammy running to us, holding Abigail's hand, Ben and Kat were following them – Guess who is staying in the Academy next year? – He said smiling from ear to ear.

- That is awesome dude! – I said smiling too, truly happy for him.

- Come one guys, you can be in love later – Kat said as soon as she reached us, she was probably cracking up about some of Ben's jokes – Miss. Raine is calling you, in a few minutes they will announce the winners.

And with that, we all went back into the theater, the time had come.


	37. Chapter 37

37-Tara

Remember that feeling of confidence I had? That amazing moment before my performance when for the first time I wasn't afraid of anything? So… _Forget that_.

I was squeezing Christian's hand so hard while we were waiting for the top dancers to be called on stage, he had to ask me to stop, his fingers were hurting, and so were Ben's. Poor guys, I wish I could just stay calm, but suddenly everything I had avoided to think was coming back to my mind. I really wanted that, but among with all those other dancers, what was the chance I had?

When the top 10 girls started to be called on stage not in any particular order as said by the judges, my breath started to get heavy, but as I heard my name a relieved smile took over my face, Grace's and Abigail's names were also called later. Then top 10 girls, were all now already on the stage, two of us would make it, and for all the other it would be over. Then, it was time for the boys.

They started calling the names, and every single time I would just wish Christian's was called. I still believed in him, even after his fall, other guys had fallen too, and had terrible scores in the Classical Round, I still believed he had a chance of being there, at least in the top 10.

Ben's name was called, and then Sammy's. At last but not at least Christian's name was called too and I was so happy for him. To see him smiling like that, after seeing him so broken moments ago gave me just the strength I needed to control my freaked out mind.

There was a little speech about how we were all winners, and how hard that decision had been for the judges, what amazing dancers we were and how proud we should be of ourselves, but honestly… No one really cared about that. You could see it in their faces, all they wanted was to know the results, and _fast_.

After two or three terrible jokes about ballerinas and their point shoes, the old smiling man finally started to announce the results.

- The girl, who won the silver medal and will represent Australia in the International Round of The Prix De Fonteyn is… - That awkward and tense silence lasted for some long seconds – Grace Whitney!

Grace was in second place? Crap. She was _perfect_. If she had won the silver medal, my chances were certainly over. Imagine me in the first place, winning the golden medal, representing the entire country in this world wide competition… Yeah, right.

Grace smiled weakly, it was obvious how hard she seemed not to care, but she wanted to be the best, always. She needed attention, and for some bizarre reason, she needed it all the time, but she would also always deny. When they handled her the medal and the flowers the host picked the microphone back up and smiled.

- And now, the girl who won the golden medal and will also represent Australia in the International Round of The Prix De Fonteyn is…

I had never been in a room _that_ silent. The two seconds he took to announce the name were enough to realize how anxious everybody was, even the judges had an anxious look on their faces and they were the ones who decided which name was about to be called. How could they be surprised at all? I looked back at the smiling host and took a deep breath, ready to hear the truth, ready to hear my journey on that competition was over.

- _Tara Webster_!

I turned my head to the backstage, I was sure someone had called my name there, I realized everybody smiling at me, and Abigail pushed me slightly to the front. It took me a few seconds more to realize someone _really_ had called my name, and this person was the same smiling man who was now holding a golden medal and extending it to me. I walked towards him, with my legs shaking, my brain couldn't process the idea it was really me. I was so surprised that I think I checked with myself once or twice if that was really my name. A woman gave me the flowers and I almost let them fall, I was just looking around expecting someone to yell "_gotcha_" at any moment.

I think one minute later I realized it was really happening and from that point on I couldn't stop smiling. Grace smiled at me with some support while everyone in the audience was standing and cheering for us, I smiled back at her, even knowing she was probably just doing it for the cameras, but if she was being truthful or not, in that moment didn't matter. I looked back at Christian, my eyes were locked in his for a few moments; he had his smile real big, probably just as big as mine, as if somehow, this conquer was not only mine, it was ours.

- And now it is time to meet the winners of the masculine category. – The host said in an excited tone, breaking my gaze with Christian – The boy who won the silver medal, and will join these two young ladies, representing our country in the International Round is… Michael Slade.

That guy was for sure the crowd favorite. He had his own little fans yelling at him from the audience. He was also one of the cockiest dancers I had seen in the backstage, I didn't even had the chance to meet him, and talk, but just to hear him speaking to other people, make me dislike him just a tinny little bit.

He had the same uncomfortable smile Grace had as she received her medal, he obviously wanted to win the golden medal, who wouldn't, but isn't it an honor to represent your country, even if you got second place?

- And the winner of the golden medal of the masculine competition, who completes the Australian team, the one who will represent the entire country in the International Round of The Prix De Fonteyn is…

I knew how Christian's chances had dropped after his fall, but why did I still had all this trust, and all this hope, I looked constantly at him, expecting it could be him. Of course I would be happy if any of the other boys had won, I would be extremely happy for Ben, he had worked so hard to put up with the second year students, all his new classes, the leukemia thing that _thankfully_ turned out to be false alarm _and_ working on his solos and preparation for this competition. Or Sammy, how incredibly happy I would be for him, to see he finally prove to his Dad and everyone else out there how amazingly talented and completely capable of following his passion for dance he was. The thing is the putting all this together, all the love I had for these two other boys, how much I wanted them to be happy, I still had these huge feeling inside of me, that right now was making me care about only one person.

I looked back and forth in between Christian and the host until the old man smiled and open the last envelope, ready to announce the name.

- _Samuel Liberman_. – The man said cheerfully.

I really wish Christian could have won; I truly wanted that for him. But being honest, Sammy deserved it. He recovered from a terrible score in his Classical Round, and today he was the epitome of a dancer. His technique had never been so perfect, and he had never been so honest in any of his performances in these last two years.

I didn't hide the proud smile in my face, he was like my brother, and now I could see my little brother taking his golden medal and walking towards the center of the stage until he reached my side. He looked at me smiling and I gave him a hug.

- You did amazing. You deserved it! – I whispered in his ear.

- We did! – He answered smiling.

The host walked closer to the end of the stage, a spotlight followed him, as he brought the microphone to his mouth one last time, until he said in a proud tone.

- Australia, these are your chosen dancers. They will be representing our country, so let's show them some love. Put your hands together for Grace Whitney, Tara Webster, Michael Slade and Samuel Liberman!

The man left the stage and the spotlight headed back at us. Everybody was cheering, even the judges were on their feet clapping and smiling at us. So that was the feeling of receiving a standing ovation… Wow! Miss. Raine was in the audience with Patrick, right in the front row. I had never seen her so happy before, I had never seen her smiling that big.

The other dancers on stage and some of the ones backstage joined us to give us congratulations. Sammy hugged me again.

- Could you in a billion years imagine this happening? – He said smiling.

- Not in a _zillions_ years I would have pictured this.

He smiled at me one last time until a proud Abigail jumped in him, wrapping her legs on his back and her arms around his neck.

- I can't believe you won! I am so proud of you! – She yelled with tears in her eyes, holding even tightly to him. I wasn't expecting her to talk to me, at least not until she and Sammy had that moment, it was completely understandable.

- Me neither. – Was the only think Sammy could say until Abigail's lips locked his and I decided to turn around to give them some privacy.

I looked back to the audience, they were still clapping and yelling excited. Then I felt a hand on my shoulder, as I turned around I could only see Ben's face for a microsecond until he picked me up by my waist, spinning me around.

- I am so proud of you! You were awesome!

- Thanks Ben! I can't believe this is happening!

- It is! I told you to believe in yourself, I told you so. I knew you could do this! – He finally put me on the ground, and a knowing smile took over his face.

Before I could say anything I felt someone holding my hand from behind me, as I turned around I saw Christian, smiling proudly at me. I tried to look back at Ben, but he had already left so I turned my stare back to Christian. We looked at each other during a few seconds just standing there, as if we were talking without any words. I held his hand tightly, until he pushed me closer to him, and we were inches apart. There was still a crow of dancers and a lot of people hadn't left the audience yet and we were right at the center of the stage with a spotlight right over us, but somehow, it all seemed in the background and none of them mattered for us in that moment.

- I won. – I whispered as he got closer to my face, lost in his intense stare.

- _My girl_. - He whispered back right before his lips slowly touched mine.


	38. Chapter 38

38-Christian

- It is party time guys! – Sammy yelled excited next to me and Tara, interrupting our… moment – You will have plenty of time to suck each other's faces later.

- I've heard that before. – I said looking at him with a disappointed smile, but still holding Tara's waist.

- Come on. We are all off to the beach; it is going to be fun! – Abigail said holding Sammy's arm.

- Yeah it is, come on, you _have_ to be there! – Sammy completed.

- We will! We wouldn't lose that. We all deserve some resting after this marathon. – Tara said putting her head in my chest.

- Who said anything about _resting_? – Sammy said putting one of his arms around her shoulder – We are gonna _party_!

We laughed and left the stage. In a few time everybody was ready to leave. It was late afternoon, but we still had a few hours until the sunset, so we had time to get to the residence and get our stuff until we could head to the beach.

- Can you believe this? Three out of the four spots? The academy is back in the track baby. Whoever doubted us in The Prix was proved wrong. – Sammy said still bumping in excitement.

- I know right? Who would have thought?

- You must be really happy for T, too.

- Of course, Training Bra deserved it, she was amazing. She _is_ amazing. I was so happy for her.

- You seemed really happy _with_ her too – Sammy said laughing – What was that whole thing in the stage?

- I was kissing my girlfriend, what is wrong with that? – I smiled embarrassed.

- Nothing, besides you were almost swallowing each other in public.

- As if you and Abigail weren't doing the same thing in the backstage.

- We at least headed back stage, you guys didn't even bother. – He said laughing.

- Come on, nobody noticed.

- Yeah, sure. Nobody noticed you getting all nasty right in the center of the stage.

- Ok Sammy, I got it. – I said laughing at him and trying to finish that conversation.

- Just… - He suddenly sounded serious, and looked at me – Just don't break her… or I might have to break you. – He tried to hide his tone with a smile, like he was kidding, but it didn't work out.

- Sorry? – I said confused with his sudden mood change.

- Tara is like my little sister, she is family. So, just try to keep yourself from doing anything stupid.

- Why are you telling me that now?

- It is almost the end of the year, than comes summer, and only God knows what waits for us next semester. So until then… I would like all of us to stay away from the drama. – He was now completely serious, staring at me. I nodded and Sammy smiled – Good, done with the girl-talk. Ready to go?

I nodded once again and we left the room with our stuff. Tara and Kat were talking and laughing in the living room waiting for us.

- Hey girls, are you all packed? – Sammy asked them.

- Yeah, and Abigail will be downstairs… - As Kat started to talk Abigail came downstairs.

- Right now! – She said excited, walking closer to Sammy.

- Where is Ben? – Tara asked.

- I think he have already left, he is probably at the beach right now. – I answered.

- So what are we still doing here? – Sammy said excited as he, Abigail and Tara ran out of the door. Kat and I stayed behind.

- Aren't you excited? – I asked her.

- Of course I am, everybody is, even Abigail. She has been so happy these last few weeks. But why wouldn't I be happy? – She said smiling, as we started to follow the guys out of the residence.

- I don't know, I just thought you'd be the first one to run out of that door.

- Usually... I just have a lot in my head today. – She said as we reached the side walk.

- Do you want to talk about it?

- Yeah… - She said with a deep breath – Tara said something that got me thinking.

- Really? And what was that? – I said trying not to sound as worried as I truly was with her.

- She was just so happy, talking about you, and future, and the Academy. That I just… I don't have any of that. I don't know if I will pass the exams this year, and I am scared, I don't know what my future will be like, if there is any at all out there waiting for me and… I am alone, so I don't really have any one there for me. – She was trying really hard to hold the tears.

- Kat – I stopped walking and looked at her, she turned her body to look back at me – If you really think that, I'm sorry, but you are crazy _and_ you're completely wrong. – I said laughing a little.

- Am I? – She tried to laugh too, but just a sad smile appeared in her face while a tear rolled down her face.

- Yes, you are. First, you _will_ pass the exams, this year you worked harder than I have ever seen you do, you deserve this, and you will get it. About the future, if Tara really told you about our talk, she told you the same I told her, we can't control the future, no matter how hard we try, we never know what is coming, but don't worry, there is _always_ something coming, you just have to work for it.

- You might be right – Kat said smiling more now, and wiping the tear out of her cheek – But I am still alone.

- Wrong again. You don't have a _boyfriend_; it doesn't mean you are alone Kat. You have us, your family. We have always been and will always be here for you, you know that. You are just scared, and that is okay, we all are sometimes. But the Kat I know, the Kat we all love, wouldn't let any of those things, even if they were true, let her down. – I looked at her smiling, and she did the same shyly – Come on, you know I'm right.

- Yes, you are. I don't know what is wrong with me.

- You are human, there is always something wrong with us. Now can we just go, everybody is at the beach having fun and we are just here, missing the party.

- Unbelievable right? – She said finally smiling.

We kept walking down the sidewalk and had some good laughs; the tension had officially been broke. In a few minutes we reached the beach. It was almost sunset time, we saw a bunch of people dancing, and eating, some were in the water, I was ready to run over to them, but before I could I felt Kat holding me back by the arm. I looked her instantly, confused.

- Thanks, okay? For everything. – She said smiling. I nodded and gave her a hug, then we both walked to where everybody else was.

It took only seconds to find Tara, Sammy, Abigail and Ben. They were chatting and laughing, thought I couldn't stop myself wondering why Tara had a little bit of a worried face. Thankfully it disappeared as soon as our eyes met.

- Hey guys! – Kat said smiling.

- Finally! – Ben said – Tara here was losing her mind worried with the two of you. – Tara just smiled embarrassed and walked over to me, giving me a hug.

- Well we are here now! – I said smiling at them, and then turning to look at Tara. She held my hand and pulled me.

- Come here. – She said getting away from the guys, I followed her.

_**Author's note: Hey guys, new chapters up. I'm sorry to say that there will probably be only two more chapters. I felt like it was the right time to finish this fic. I'll do my best to make the next chapters especial, I promise. Thank you everyone that is still reading this fic, and thanks for all the reviews, they always make me want to write more. Please guys if you like it let me know :D**_


	39. Chapter 39

39-Tara

I held Christian's hand as we walked silently down the beach. After a few minutes it was almost sunset time and we were already away from the rest of the students that now were only a blur in the distance.

When I consider we were far enough I sat down in the sand taking one more look at Christian's confused face. He had this cute smile, obviously trying to make sense of this situation. He probably didn't understand yet, but I had my reasons. I needed to get some things straight with him, and I had to tell him some things I had been saving for myself. I had to do it now, while we still had time, before it all started again with the Academy craziness.

- So… - He said sitting next to me, while I looked straight to the ocean.

- Why did I bring you here, right? – I said smiling at him.

- Yeah, everybody is back there, celebrating. Why are we here?

- I needed you for a bit. Just for myself… - He gave me a cocky smile - I know, selfish. – I laughed.

- It's totally okay with me. – He laughed too, putting his arm around my back.

- But… there is more than that. – I said resting my head in his shoulder.

- I guessed. – He took a deep breath.

- You know that thing you said, about us not spending time together. – I looked at him and he nodded – About missing me… - He nodded once again – I've missed you too, you know?

- I know, you told me. – He said softly and kissed my forehead.

- I want to fix that… And the year is almost over. – I looked at him serious.

- Yeah... – He looked back down at me with worried eyes.

- I was thinking… vacation is a month away. In two weeks, comes the International Round of The Prix and everything will be a hot mess again. – He looked at me still confused waiting for me to get to my point – So before that happens, I wanted to say, actually, I want to ask you something.

- You are not proposing to me, are you? – He said quickly with a funny shocked look, I had to laugh at him – Because I am _almost_ sure that _I'm_ the one who is supposed to do that. – I laughed even harder and Christian did the same, hugging me.

- No! – I tried to control myself – But this is important too.

- Fine, what is it? – He was, just like me, having a hard time to stop laughing.

- My parents… They don't know yet that we are like… _Dating_ again. – He looked at me serious – They knew we weren't cool when I came back to the Academy, so they didn't ask anything. – I said the words slowly waiting for his reaction.

- All those times you talked… They _never_ asked? _Anything_? – He said, not really buying it. I wouldn't blame him, he knows my parents really well. And they _always_ ask, about _everything_.

- They must have thought that I was having trouble to get back to dance, and go through my recovery. They knew, back home, there was something wrong. They asked if everything was okay with me a few times when I was with them at the farm, and then when they got no answers, they started asking about _us_…

- What did you do? – His voice was becoming lower and sadder.

- I dodged their questions as much as I could. It was easier with Dad, but Mom… - My voice was getting sadder too - She had her own suspicions. – I was trying not to think about those memories, I was a complete wreck back then and I made my parents so damn worried about me. I remember not wanting to speak or see anyone, they had lots of questions and they were getting nothing from me. It was a hard time for all of us.

- So they _did_ ask you about us? Do they know what happened now? – He looked at me serious, with a little bit of scared look.

- They asked me about us. They had questions about you, actually. But I didn't need to answer them for my parents to notice there was something wrong going on. With time… They just stopped coming back to that topic and when I returned to the Academy, they never asked me about _that_ again. None of the times we talked since then they brought it up…

- Why didn't you tell them? – He said with his voice down.

- They were worried about my back, and the recovery; the doctor said there were risks... I didn't know how to tell them, especially with all our ups and downs lately, you know we had lots of them. I didn't want to tell them we were together, and in the next day say we had broken up again… I just didn't want to make them disappointed or worried anymore.

- _Disappointed_? – He said skeptical.

- Look – I said with a calm tone – The thing I really needed to ask you… has to do with that. – I held one of his hands again and looked at him straight to the eyes – I want you to come to the farm with me again, if you like, we could tell them together. We could have time to really _be_ together after all we have been through this year.

- Are they okay with me coming back? Have you talked to them about it?

- Not yet. But I am sure they won't find it a problem. – He looked back at the sea serious.

- Your father must be mad at me Tara. I should be looking out for his little girl. I should have been there for you through everything. – He kept his eyes in the ocean and his tone serious, his voice would go louder at some points, but he was probably yelling at him, not at me - And instead we were fighting, because of some stupid thing _I_ did… Does he know? About me and…

- Kat? – I completed, and he nodded sadly – No. I mean, I think he doesn't, but as I said my Mom had her suspicions. Kat called us lots of times, and I never took her calls, so my mother knew there was something wrong. She eventually talked to me, she didn't know the entire story, but she knew it had to do with you… - Christian looked down, he seemed embarrassed - I asked her to keep it a secret… I don't know if she did though. – I said softly, trying to comfort him.

- Great. They _both_ probably hate me by now.

- No, they don't. They wouldn't. Even if they both know, you can prove them wrong. My point is that, if we want to do this, they have to know… _We_ have to tell them - I said low, and he finally looked at me after a few seconds – I'm not telling them alone. – I whispered.

Christian took a look back into the ocean. By now it was already sunset, the sky was a beautiful mix of orange, yellow and blue; there were almost no clouds, and the sea… It was awesome, the water was calm, and there were practically no waves at all, making it possible for the ocean to become almost a mirror, reflecting perfectly the amazing sky above us.

He took a few time lost in that view; while I started to ask myself if I would get any answer at all from him. Should I have told Christian everything? If I didn't tell him now, he would have to know at some point anyway, right? Why did I feel like I had hurt him, then? It was all going perfectly with us for now, I didn't want to screw it up, but he had to know what was on my mind, and he had to know about my parents. I wish I could know what they were thinking but as I honestly didn't I knew me and Christian would have to face them together, especially my Dad. If he had known _half_ of what happened between us these last months, things with him would be… _Tough_.

I suddenly felt his hand holding mine tighter. I looked to Christian that thankfully had a smile on his face now.

- Okay. – He said gently – I'll go with you.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him, letting all my weight fall over him, which made us both, lay in the sand. He laughed at me as I stand over him. The sun was almost gone now, it was getting dark, but we were inches apart so I could still see his face clear.

- You look stunning in the sunset. – He said putting part of my hair that was covering my face, behind my ear.

- Thanks. – I answered feeling my cheeks burning – You don't look that bad either. – I said looking away, so he wouldn't see me blush.

- I'm glad you told me everything.

He smiled and I smiled back at him, then he kissed me. First it was soft and slow, but before I knew it the kiss had deepened and we had our arms wrapped around each other, laid on the sand as the last sun rays of the day disappeared behind us.


	40. Chapter 40

40-Christian

I wouldn't mind having a summer like our last. I wouldn't mind spending the vacation just the way we were now… _Together_. And yes, I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't worried about what Tara told me. At first I even thought she was ashamed of me, and of our relationship or something, but she was right, we had to tell them together, if we wanted this to work out.

It was for sure a great ending for a great day. Lying in the sand kissing the girl I loved, while the sun was hiding behind the sea. If I paid really good attention I could hear our friends, yelling in the other side of the beach. It sounded like a great party, but it wouldn't replace this moment.

When we let go off the kiss, I opened my eyes, to find a smiling Tara lying in my chest. I caressed her hair for a moment… Yeah, I was _for sure_ enjoying this summer break.

- Do you want to go back now? – She whispered.

- Not really. – I smiled at her.

- Yeah, me neither, but… it would be rude for us to just stay here on our own while everyone else is there. – She said pointing where the rest of the crew was.

I nodded sadly and we got up from the sand, making our way back to the "party", holding hands. As we got there I could see some things had changed. They had made a fire, some kids were now drunk, and plenty of them were in the water, it was hard to tell how many, as it was getting dark and there were only a few lights in the sand. Sammy and Abgail were as always together and Ben was with them; they were all next to the fire with some marshmallows.

- I thought you guys had left. You disappeared. – Abigail said as we reached their side.

- No, I saw them walking down the beach... I think I saw them rolling in the sand too. – Sammy laughed.

- Guys come on I'm trying to eat here. – Ben said making a disgusted face.

We all laughed at him, and me and Tara sat next to them, taking some marshmallows to ourselves. We stood there talking for quite a while, about the Prix, about vacation, about Ben's lack of skills to cook his marshmallow and with time, everybody started to leave and jump in the water, until it was just me and Tara there, facing the fire.

- Do you want to join them? – She asked me.

- Let's just… stay here for a moment. – I said looking at her face lightened by the flames.

- Okay. – She rested her head on my shoulder while we both looked to the guys in the ocean – Wow; they look completely drunk in there. – She laughed at the bunch of people in the water falling over each other.

- Some of them are. – I laughed too.

- I will miss this when the year is over.

- Drunk people almost drowning in the sea?

- No! – She punched me lightly in the arm – Everybody, all of us together… I don't know, I just have this feeling that next year things won't be the same.

- Of course they won't. – I said looking at her again – It's not necessarily a bad thing.

- I know, but that worries me a little. When I first entered the Academy it was like a dream coming true. I never imagined getting to third year, it was all so surreal. And now it is just around the corner…

- You think it was surreal for _you_? I wasn't planning on staying two weeks, who would ever think I would last two _years_? – I laughed.

- It doesn't even look like that long, does it? - Tara continued to sound serious, although there was something nostalgic in her voice.

- I mean, sometimes. – She looked at me confused – Let's admit we have been through some bad times here, and yeah, sometimes it looks like we just entered yesterday, but if you think about it, our journey in the Academy has been a hell of a ride, it took us time to get to the point we are now.

- Yeah, I think that… I think that is what I'm really afraid of. – She said with her head down for a second, she was obviously worried. I put my arm around her shoulders bringing her closer to me, which made her look up again, the worries were still there but Tara tried to smile them off.

- What are you afraid of?

- Hum… You know… This "crazy ride" you were talking about… I was thinking that in first year, I was humiliated, I was the worst in every single class, I almost had to drop off and then everything turned upside down. Suddenly I got the scholarship, I danced Clara, I fell in love… _Twice_. – She gave me a weak smile, there had been a long time since she talked about the first guy she fell in love in the Academy, _Ethan_, but I dropped it and waited for her to continue, we were over that. – Then the second year came, we had got together in the summer, the classes started and suddenly unlike last year, there were lots to lose. Then there was Grace, Saskia, the injury in my back, The Prix and… - She stopped herself and looked at me a little uncertain if she should go back to that topic.

- Me and Kat. – I completed trying to seem cool with.

- Yeah. – She sounded embarrassed – This year was nothing I had expected it to be, it was so amazingly good and bad in so many different ways. I think what I'm trying to say is that… After all the experiences I had over these two years, I'm afraid of what might come in the next one.

- Don't be. I don't have a pretty good track record either, but I assure you that there is nothing they can throw on us that we can't take anymore. Come on, it is going to be our last year, so don't worry about it, just relax and enjoy, cause _now_ it is gonna be our turn to _rule_ the Academy.

- Wow! – She laughed – _"Rule" the Academy_. – Tara said in a sarcastic tone.

- Make fun of it as much as you like, but didn't you think the seniors were the _coolest_ guys on school when you were a freshman? – She looked at me with a smile like "you are not really asking me that" and then the penny dropped… Ethan. I laughed at her look – Okay, don't answer that one.

She laughed at me back, it was good to be comfortable to talk about those kinds of things, things as me and Kat, Ethan and even Ben, we found a way of working it all out, as impossible as it may have seemed sometimes.

- Hey Christian. – Tara said breaking the silence. I looked down at her and she was starring into my eyes – Can I ask you one last thing? Then I _swea_r we will be done with this therapy section.

- Sure, anything. – I smiled at her.

- Remember last summer, when we promised we wouldn't let anything get in between us?

- Yeah, why? – I said confuse.

- _Despite_ the bumps in the road, you know… We actually managed to keep that promise, it is almost the end of the year, and we are together.

- You're right. I mean, we didn't go through the _entire_ year together, but as we are now, so we did a pretty good job. – I pecked her lips – But what was that you wanted to ask me?

- This is gonna sound really stupid, and it probably is, but as we are here and together now… And just so you know, you don't need to do it if you don't want to, because as I said it is really stupid and…

- Tara – I interrupted her – The point…

- Yeah, sorry. This is gonna sound really, really stupid, but I would like to kind of renew that promise. I know nothing about what next year is going to be like, but I would love to have something certain in my life, especially if that is something as important to me… as you.

I looked at her in silence for a while, straight to her eyes, trying not to laugh as I realized she was blushing. After a few seconds she looked aside and laughed.

- Sorry, I told you so. That was probably the lamest thing I said this year. I really didn't mean to… - I interrupted her once again, but this time, I kissed her. She looked so surprised at first she didn't react, but then I could feel she start to deepen in the kiss.

When we let go she had a wide smile, her hands were in my chest and she was looking down, it took her a few time to look back up at me with her red cheeks popping in her face.

- So…

- Yes, Tara. Promise, vow, whatever that was, it's for sure still on. – I answered smiling and she kissed me once again.

While we kissed I could feel her lips forming a smile, it was an amazing feeling but as usual there is something to interrupt one of those moments. I felt cold water dropping in my skin, and I'm pretty sure Tara did too, because we both let go of the kiss at the same time, looking surprised to each other and then looking up. Standing next to us was a completely wet Ben smiling with his arms wide open. Sammy and Abgail were coming right from behind him.

- _Group hug_! – Ben yelled excited as the three of them jumped on me and Tara.

We all fell in the sand, completely dirty by now. It only took a second for us to decide jumping in the sea too. Tara and I were the last walking towards it. We held hands until we hit the water. As we reached it, I felt the cold water on my feet and looked at her; smiling amazed by the picture we were in. If I was to define that moment with one word, it would probably be _happiness_, but _love_ would love would fit just as well.

In the Academy we are always searching for perfection, but not one of us is perfect, no questions asked. We all have our mistakes and we all have our defects, the important part though, is that we all have our qualities. So _yes_, we are always searching for perfection, and _no_, none of us can do it alone. That is why we learn to do it together, put we all as one and we will be just as perfect as our imperfections let us be. We will be the best we can be, because we bring the best out of each other. I see that now, through the glances of my friends, or if you like, _my family_, lost in between the sea and the sky in this bright perfect night.

**_Author's note: So yes, this was the end in this fic :( Thanks for all the reviews and great comments, you guys made me inspired to write all these chapters and keep on with this story. I hope the last two chapters were good, I really hope you have liked reading this story as much as liked writing it for you. It was a pleasure. So really, just thanks for everything! :D xo_**


End file.
